Is this OCD?

[sufferer]

Hi all.

I've been feeling a certain way for a while now, and hoped that it would go away. It hasn't.

I've suffered with various forms of ocd for many, many years, but have symptoms lately that are new to me, and I'm not sure what to label them as, or where to start to feel better.

If I list them, I wonder if anyone would be kind enough to tell me what they think...

1) I worry about my health and that of my loved ones, constantly. I've been back and fore to my GP and had numerous tests. When one thing is ruled out I start worrying about another or wondering if the DR got it wrong.

2) I have a constant feeling of dread, that one day I won't be here anymore, what will happen to my daughter etc. I worry about the future and that things may change. I have butterflies in my stomach and constant anxiety.

3) I don't enjoy time to myself anymore. My OH works shifts and I used to quite enjoy an evening to myself, catch up on some tv, eat nice food. Now I hate it. I hate him not being here and feel afraid to be on my own. I lose interest in everything and feel like I need to get out of the house and be around people to distract me from my thoughts.

Can anyone relate?

[PolarBear]

Of course it's OCD. It just shifted it's fixation onto other topics.

Now, knowing that, can you see how repeatedly going to the doctor and getting tests is a compulsion?

[sufferer]

It's just so different from my usual 'brand' of OCD

I know going back and fore to the DR is a no-no. I did have some issues that meant it necessary, but I did refuse their offer of a CT scan as they seemed to be doing it just to appease me.

What about the feelings of dread and constant butterflies? Is that OCD too? If so, how should I challenge it? Before if I had an issue with say, contamination, I would resist the urge to wash my hands etc. But how do I deal with this?

[PolarBear]

Well, do you spend a lot of time thinking about your dread feeling? Trying to figure out what it means? That would be rumination, a compulsion.

[sufferer]

I do, yes. I don't know where it came from so I think about that a lot.

I just don't know how to stop it.

[PolarBear]

Ruminating is hard to stop. I did a video titled How to Stop Ruminating on YouTube. Check it out.

[sufferer]

Thank you PolarBear, I'll take a look.

[sufferer]

Polarbear, could you post a link to the video? I can't find it...

[Guest OCDhavenobrain]

 

[sufferer]

Super helpful and a HUGE help to me right now.

Thank you PolarBear and thank you OCDhavenobrain for posting

[PolarBear]