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OCDhavenobrain

Getting stuck on things, can I blame OCD?

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Can I ask something I have wondered about for quite some time? I do something I actually really dislike with myself for quite a bit, and it is such a waste of time and it also makes me tired and I get tired of myself when doing it but yea it is a vicious cycle. Also it is a trait I really disliked with my mom when I was a child, never do anything today, always wait to tomorrow. If I am ever getting children I will motivate them to do everything NOW and having a busy schedule, I love my parents. 

I am sitting here wondering (once again) what the core of this problem actually is, I DO ADMIT that it is plain laziness, but there also seems to be something else in the mix, because I don't really think that other people get as stuck on things as I do. Like today, I was unsure if I was going out, and if I was going out I had to decide if I were going to wear a jacket or not, so I sat down and wondered than do I look on the weather forecast in case they can give me a clue or something, and 1 hour later I get even more lazy bvecause I realize I have wasted 1 hour and it goes on and on and on. 

When I am out (even if I had a plan when I was home) I second guess and think if I really should do it today, or if I should wait till tomorrow. And it goes on and on and on. I feel the best with my self when I just do things, and I really really start to appreciate to have a schedule.

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So for me it sounds very much like the spectrum, it really do. Because if I have understood things right this is a common problem when one is on the spectrum, BUT I am also wondering if you are having the same prbolem because it could also be OCD, BUT it could be such a deeprooted thing because I think I have been like this for quite some time (since childhood) so if it isn't autism then it is compulsions which have been there for quite some time. BECAUSE I have this notion of getting it perfect, I can sit and wait on some neighbour leaving with her car because then I doesnt have to say hello or I can wait on weather, or I can wait on someone I know saying something just to have the best situation to do it. So that could be OCD but yea. 

Can anyone relate to having problem with getting started and when you have get started do you very easily get lazy again?

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I think that this could, at least in part, be down to anxiety. I procrastinate too and partly it is because of laziness, but also I do feel a great deal of anxiety about all of the complications that occur when I start doing things. However, this is usually about bigger things, mainly work related stuff, and not necessarily small decisions like deciding to go out or not. 

Have you been diagnosed as being on the ASD spectrum or is this something that you believe about yourself?

My brother has autism, although he is on the severe end of the spectrum (non verbal etc) but rigidity is definitely a huge problem for him and I've observed this among other autistic people who are 'high functioning' 

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Thank you I have wondered about this a lot and today I did again because it hit me once again. The thing you said about anxiety is probably as right as it gets, I am fearful of failing and if you never start you never fail... I do procrastinate, and I have always done and it has been because of that reason. When it comes to the rigidity it is tricky, because I can't put my finger on it. I do actually see myself as pretty impulsive but it could just be an illusion, I want to do the things I find funny (could also be a sign when I think about it), but it is not as I get angry if I can't do what I love/like it is more like I get lazy, I do admit that I get lazy because that is the name for not doing a less funny thing that you could. When it comes to OCD I have had periods when I have been obsessed with the thinking that I need to be as happy as I can. I do acknowledge the saying that when you are trying to find the happiness you are missing it because that was an obsession for me. 

Besides there is a small portion of analyzing me when it comes to autism, this is something I do find in myself and I have no problem if it is pure laziness but it would be nice if it was OCD because then maybe this bad habit has potential to disappear if I attack it.

Edited by OCDhavenobrain

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I will have to make a plan or somehing about this. Because I really do hate thid behaviour in myself and I already disliked it in others when I was a kid. Id o think it is about compulsivneds in some regard. Your tip about anxiety and procrastination was spot on, hmjust have to see gow deep it runs. I have been fearful of failures since I was a kid so that is that and probably why this could be deeprooted. Than if it is too deep (autism) therr is nothing I can do about it. However it is something I dislike about myself, if you have rigidity because of autism maybe that is not happening (the disliking)? I dont know. Well, I have to see.

Take care everybody

Edited by OCDhavenobrain

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The only way to work on this is to just "do". You have recognised a pattern in your behaviour, so next time it pops up, you just have to force yourself to get into action. 

13 minutes ago, OCDhavenobrain said:

Than if it is too deep (autism) therr is nothing I can do about it. However it is something I dislike about myself, if you have rigidity because of autism maybe that is not happening (the disliking)? I dont know. Well, I have to see.

Take care everybody

I think that even if it is autism, you can still do something to change this, everyone is capable of changing their behaviour 

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Procrastination often has anxiety at its core, I think. There is a good and fun TED talk on procrastination if you are interested.

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I have the same problem, and I hate it when people describe me as lazy because I do feel there is more to it than simply laziness. Interestingly, I am becoming more and more sure I am on the spectrum, so autism could be part of it for us both.

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55 minutes ago, Lost_in_a_Dark_Maze said:

I have the same problem, and I hate it when people describe me as lazy because I do feel there is more to it than simply laziness. Interestingly, I am becoming more and more sure I am on the spectrum, so autism could be part of it for us both.

I know right? It is a strange thing really because at the same time as I do acknowledge myself as being lazy I feel like there is something more to it. I can give small bursts of energy but do I always seems to get "lazy" again. I do call this laziness because it always comes after the initial motivation, it is really easy to do something when you are motivated but let's face it most people do things without being motivated. So I also consider me being somewhat of a brat. You could have much harder problems with this than me or of some other reasons but that is how I experience it. 

I mean I was not like this in school, or was I? I do remember that I have had a problem organize my things but that doesn't mean to imply autism. 

I will try my best not to get stuck but this is really hard because it feels so fragile, but this feeling is because of OCD because I will honestly say that I have been organizing things in my head, even if all my others compulsions are much better and my anxiety is not even close to where it was, pretty crazy what a difference  I am experiencing, That feeling of being totally exposed to uncertainty has not been there for a while.

But let's say we are on the spectrum, both of us, couldn't it be that all this thinking about it could be hurtful? If we truly are and there truly are problems which people on the spectrum experience than there will be a real difference in how we function. and not only something you can work around. I don't know personally, some years have gone because of OCD that am I totally certain of! But I am also wondering if there is more to it. I will try my best to stop wanting to organize and I will see if it lightens up for me. 

Don't feel lazy if you don't want to, your reason for having it could be something else or you are just too hard on yourself. But it is inttresting that someone else is experiencing a feeling of not getting stuck and not doing what you want, it's like there is a resistance which doesn't need to be there.

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6 minutes ago, OCDhavenobrain said:

I know right? It is a strange thing really because at the same time as I do acknowledge myself as being lazy I feel like there is something more to it. I can give small bursts of energy but do I always seems to get "lazy" again.

I know this feeling quite well, but now you have defined the problem you can work on it. Maybe when you see your motivation and energy waning, you remind yourself of this post and continue to do the thing you were doing, instead of giving up. 

7 minutes ago, OCDhavenobrain said:

If we truly are and there truly are problems which people on the spectrum experience than there will be a real difference in how we function. and not only something you can work around.

But isn't this the same as dealing with OCD? I mean there is some difference in how we, as OCD sufferers, function compared to other people. Yet we are taught to change our pattern on behaviour. If you truly are on the spectrum, you are still in control of your behaviour and if you don't like something about yourself, you can attempt to change it. 

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1 hour ago, OCDhavenobrain said:

I know right? It is a strange thing really because at the same time as I do acknowledge myself as being lazy I feel like there is something more to it. I can give small bursts of energy but do I always seems to get "lazy" again. I do call this laziness because it always comes after the initial motivation, it is really easy to do something when you are motivated but let's face it most people do things without being motivated. So I also consider me being somewhat of a brat. You could have much harder problems with this than me or of some other reasons but that is how I experience it. 

I mean I was not like this in school, or was I? I do remember that I have had a problem organize my things but that doesn't mean to imply autism. 

I will try my best not to get stuck but this is really hard because it feels so fragile, but this feeling is because of OCD because I will honestly say that I have been organizing things in my head, even if all my others compulsions are much better and my anxiety is not even close to where it was, pretty crazy what a difference  I am experiencing, That feeling of being totally exposed to uncertainty has not been there for a while.

But let's say we are on the spectrum, both of us, couldn't it be that all this thinking about it could be hurtful? If we truly are and there truly are problems which people on the spectrum experience than there will be a real difference in how we function. and not only something you can work around. I don't know personally, some years have gone because of OCD that am I totally certain of! But I am also wondering if there is more to it. I will try my best to stop wanting to organize and I will see if it lightens up for me. 

Don't feel lazy if you don't want to, your reason for having it could be something else or you are just too hard on yourself. But it is inttresting that someone else is experiencing a feeling of not getting stuck and not doing what you want, it's like there is a resistance which doesn't need to be there.

I think maybe part of the reason being called lazy upsets me so much is that I do also doubt myself and question whether I really am just lazy.

The "laziness" after the initial motivation is something I can also very much relate to. I wonder if it could be burnout?

I think you are right that too much thinking about it (all the rumination and mental compulsions), are a result of our OCD though.

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I did read it. I am not sure if I really can agree with the thinking that because you have autism you have a reason. But I do understand the difference with autism and other conditions. That is the reason I think abput it too. Just to answer Malina, if autismdiagnosis is correct than it is intended that there are no cure to it, tjat is how it isbthought about autism. When it comes to OCD therr is a cure. I do know that even if this is true you can improve with the symptoms to a great extent.

 

So the article then. I am not convinced because she wrote that she was thinking a lot and therefore it took up her time to do other things. To me it becomes tricky really fast because how useful isbit to identify "too much" with a diagnosis. Is it not better to try to do your best. I don't know and it is sensitve topics because people can be offended but really not sure about the usefulness of top much identification with diagnosis. 

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"but that you may actually be quite busy and productive in your own way, a way that may not be readily visible?  "

She is talking about sitting being in one's own head. I am sorry but I don't think thatvis even a good approach to it. Every person who ever have had a longer break from work will know thatvif she/he could follow their feelings she/he would stay at home. Habits form really quick and itbis like with training. Nobody would say to someone who can't run 5 miles to not start moving because he she gets tired. Instead he advixe would be to start moving, small steps of course, but one day he will be able to run those 5 miles.

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On 06/05/2019 at 17:02, Lost_in_a_Dark_Maze said:

I don't necessarily agree with everything she wrote, but the general idea that sometimes we are doing our best, even though it may not look like it.

I have thought about it some more and in the end what we do is what we do, no need to beat yourself up about the past but when it comes to the future one could have as goal to stop analyzing it all. 

One thing I want to add is that anxiety really is an enerydrainer. 10 years ago I feelt like I had much energy and therefore maybe did I feel that I could handle life +OCD. As we get older we get less energy and let's be frank nobody should have to waste their energy to anxiety. There is one thing I am certain of afte rthose years and that is that anxiety can and will manifest itself in so many ways, in the whole body.

Please take care and do not beat yourself up about past time but planning for the future and improving where one wants to improve.

After all getting over OCD is an achivement in itself.

 

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There is one more thing I want to share with you and other here. Something motivating, accordingly to some studies executive function are decreased in OCD, I havemt read if this is the case after recovery but my logic says that it won't. I myself feel a feeling of being unable to zoom in when having OCD. It was actually that feeling I once got on SSRI that made me lile them, now that went away fairly quickly but yea. And also anxoety in general tends to totally destroy this.

 

Let us all recover and take it from there

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There are so much written on this and I am glad I found it because I suddenly realize where I am lacking and I am lacking BIG. So now I will try my best to improve, before I had no clue why I get stuck on things (which aren't even OCD-related) like starting doing something, when I am free to do what I like I can end up even deciding to go outside and then time goes and you also feel guilty and bad about it. So yea, everybody that feels like they have problem organizing, getting started or keeping on track -- read about it. I finally can say where I lack, also judging your own performances is 

 

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