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Ashley

Swindon OCD Support Group Discussion

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Unfortunately this week's Swindon OCD Support Group as been cancelled.  

This discussion as been opened for members of the Swindon OCD Support Group to offer them a place to reach out for support in the absence of the group, and will be actively monitored by Laura (username to follow) and Ashley during the times that the support group usually operates (7-9pm).  Group members are welcome to create an account and join in the conversation, and regular forum members are also welcome to offer our group helpful advice and support.

Should any of the Swindon group prefer to talk one-on-one then OCD-UK will offer a telephone call back on the Wednesday (8th).

 

Registering on the forums

If you're new to the OCD-UK online forums the first thing you need to do is create an account. It's completely free and you can create an alias, you don't need to use your real name. To register simply click the sign up Link on our website. The system will send you an automated email asking you to confirm your account and once you confirm that you're good to go, you can sign in and post your first message below.  Note: We have had to block users with gmail accounts because of the vast amount of spam originating from users with gmail accounts. You will need to register for the forum with a non gmail account.

To sign up please click the 'sign up' links at the top of the forum page. If you can't find them, please follow the instructions below. 

From a Desktop PC/Laptop
Click the grey 'Sign up' in the top right corner as shown here. 

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From a Mobile
Simply click the Hamburger icon on the right (1) and then click the green sign up button (2).

(1) The hamburger icon is the little three lines to the right of the blue bar.

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 (2) then from the new menu simply click the green sign up button. 

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Hi Everyone!

This is Laura and I will be here on Tuesday between 7 and 9pm to help support you should you need it! Ash (founder of OCD-UK) will also be part of the discussion so please feel free to message and concerns or questions or just use this as a safe space to talk everything OCD during this difficult time.

 

Much love

Laura

 

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Evening everyone! Just to say I am here if anyone wants to say 'hi'. This is a closed group only advertised to those who do or are interested in attending the Swindon group. As per usual - all discussions are confidential to the group and all responses are respectful. Ash and I are here till 9 if anyone wants to post 

 

Much love

Laura

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3 minutes ago, Goldie80 said:

all discussions are confidential to the group

And the rest of the internet :D   But fear not friends, we can log in with aliases, nobody needs to reveal their real names unless they feel comfortable to do so.  If you have already registered with a username that is identifiable email me ashley@ocduk.org and I will change straight away for you. 

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So.... My first question to anyone who comes on is how is CV19 affecting your OCD? For me I actually think my OCD is easier! Mine centres so much around letting people down and as I am not seeing many people I am not getting the mental battles!

How are you all? This must be so hard for those of you who battle with contamination issues 

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Hi Laura, Ashley, not sure how this 'social media' stuff works (!) but I thought i'd pop in and see how everyone's getting on .... often think of the members of the group & hope the're doing well

Best, Raj

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5 minutes ago, Goldie80 said:

Mine centres so much around letting people down and as I am not seeing many people I am not getting the mental battles

So my first question back at you is when this is all over, what are you going to do to try and challenge this aspect of your OCD?  😉  That's how we roll on here Laura, we like to get each other thinking and answering :)

 

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Just now, Room101 said:

Hi Laura, Ashley, not sure how this 'social media' stuff works (!) but I thought i'd pop in and see how everyone's getting on .... often think of the members of the group & hope the're doing well

Best, Raj

Social media.... how dare you sir, we were here long before social media :D     Only joking Raj, I know what you meant really (I also tell naff jokes on here sometimes).   The forum is a great place to seek support on bad days, not just now but in the weeks or months ahead.   

We do have forum for parents, a bit quiet, but when anybody posts there is usually a reply to that within a few hours. 

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Just now, Goldie80 said:

Doing well Room101! How are you all?

Great username.   The first time I hosted my Nottingham support group in the Jury's Hotel which we use they had allocated us Room 101, purely coincidence but was a great ice breaker that night. 

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Hi

I'm a regular a group attendee using an alias, haven't used anything like this before, so a new skill for me.

My main issues are around contamination and responsibility and generally catastrophising ( have I spelt that right)☺.

I am trying hard not to warch/listen to too my news so at times am living in a little bubble, then leave the house to shop  ( only done once) and it all seems very real.

It's strange to be told to worry about all the things you normally worry about and the rest of the world joining in. 

Becoming more of a recluse though does make some other worries less, as your interaction with the rest of the world is less, so get what you  mean Laura.

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Hi Annie14 (love an alias! VERY mysterious). I can imagine how hard it must be to be told to do all the things you are usually battling so hard not to do. I think restricting access to the media and news on this is a great idea. There is so much catastrophising and click bait on it! Are you able to get involved in any hobbies to keep you distracted and keep  your brain busy?

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4 minutes ago, Annie14 said:

It's strange to be told to worry about all the things you normally worry about and the rest of the world joining in. 

Hello Annie :)

I think the important thing to remember here (which if we can accept, might help us challenge our OCD long term) is that when we wash our hands now, it's for a genuine identifiable threat. Like you, I had contamination fears and what we do/used to do is wash our hands because of a 'perceived' risk.  The OCD makes us 'feel' the perceived threat is genuine and real, which it might be, but usually a 0.1% risk, where the OCD makes us 'feel' the risk is 99% likely. 

Hopefully that subtle difference and way of thinking might help.

Ashley. 

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No worries Ashley, bad jokes are great, especially during these crazy times .... keep them up & don't forget .... there are no coincidences 😉

Laura, we're all good. My boys finding it tough at the mo and of course we try to support the best we can ..... going to be some time before clinic can help I imagine

I see Annie14 needs a chat so I'm going to go and let you talk to her (?) and anyone else whose going to be in touch

Very best to both

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Just now, Room101 said:

No worries Ashley, bad jokes are great, especially during these crazy times .... keep them up & don't forget .... there are no coincidences 😉

Laura, we're all good. My boys finding it tough at the mo and of course we try to support the best we can ..... going to be some time before clinic can help I imagine

I see Annie14 needs a chat so I'm going to go and let you talk to her (?) and anyone else whose going to be in touch

Very best to both

Much love Room101 to you and the whole family! Thinking of you all 

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1 minute ago, Room101 said:

going to be some time before clinic can help I imagine

Oxford?  I have not spoke to Paul for a week, we have both been working 24/7 it feels, but I know the last time I spoke to him they;re gearing up to start doing work remotely via telephone/cam.   It won't be ideal, but it may allow some groundwork to be started if they can offer that to you.

 

 

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Just now, Ashley said:

Oxford?  I have not spoke to Paul for a week, we have both been working 24/7 it feels, but I know the last time I spoke to him they;re gearing up to start doing work remotely via telephone/cam.   It won't be ideal, but it may allow some groundwork to be started if they can offer that to you.

 

 

Yes Oxford but they need confirmation of funding for the treatment from GCC as seems the original was just for assessment. We've fired off a chaser & yes, if help is in form of remote contact then better than none ... as was the assessment

Keep well

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1 minute ago, Room101 said:

Yes Oxford but they need confirmation of funding for the treatment from GCC as seems the original was just for assessment. We've fired off a chaser & yes, if help is in form of remote contact then better than none ... as was the assessment

Oh right ok.  Well it would be very, very naughty of the CCG to offer an assessment and then pull the treatment funding, so fingers crossed just a matter of time.  If there is an issue let me know and I will happily pressure the CCG on your behalf should you need the charity too (no guarantee it would help, but we can try if we need to). 

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Is worry a hobby, takes up so much of my spare time normally  (ha ha). I am working from home which really helps and enjoy the garden and the odd walk. It certainly makes you appreciate the little things even more. I can lose myself in tv (waste of time I know).

So no home based hobbies as such, plan to start reading more and I have loads of sorting out to do in the house too. One of my strategies if I think something is slightly contaminated is squirrel it away as I feel guilty about waste and so find it hard to throw things away e,g a pair of shoes I walked near/through a contaminate have nothing obvious on but in my head feels contaminated. I can't give them away if they are not good enough for me to wear, can't throw them away, can't wear them (damned if I do ....)

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8 minutes ago, Annie14 said:

a pair of shoes I walked near/through a contaminate have nothing obvious on but in my head feels contaminated. I can't give them away if they are not good enough for me to wear, can't throw them away, can't wear them (damned if I do ....)

I can relate to that Annie, I used to do the same.  I have highlighted the word that I always come back to with my own OCD to remind myself, a feeling is not real. 

Obviously you don;t have to accept this challenge, so please don't let me pressure you into doing this if you're not ready. But, could you wear those shoes next time you go to Laura's group? Or even take them in a bag if you don't feel ready to wear out and perhaps wear them for 10 minutes of the group?     

But please, don't let me pressure you, I know with all my OCD challenges I had to get it right in my own head before I could do it.   Even if it takes you a year to get to that point, I am sure Laura and the group would be so pleased to see you in those 🥿 one day :)

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18 minutes ago, Ashley said:

Hello Annie :)

I think the important thing to remember here (which if we can accept, might help us challenge our OCD long term) is that when we wash our hands now, it's for a genuine identifiable threat. Like you, I had contamination fears and what we do/used to do is wash our hands because of a 'perceived' risk.  The OCD makes us 'feel' the perceived threat is genuine and real, which it might be, but usually a 0.1% risk, where the OCD makes us 'feel' the risk is 99% likely. 

Hopefully that subtle difference and way of thinking might help.

Ashley. 

Makes sense thanks, but I'll struggle with feeling the risk is only 0.1% in any circumstance.

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7 minutes ago, Annie14 said:

Is worry a hobby, takes up so much of my spare time normally  (ha ha). I am working from home which really helps and enjoy the garden and the odd walk. It certainly makes you appreciate the little things even more. I can lose myself in tv (waste of time I know).

So no home based hobbies as such, plan to start reading more and I have loads of sorting out to do in the house too. One of my strategies if I think something is slightly contaminated is squirrel it away as I feel guilty about waste and so find it hard to throw things away e,g a pair of shoes I walked near/through a contaminate have nothing obvious on but in my head feels contaminated. I can't give them away if they are not good enough for me to wear, can't throw them away, can't wear them (damned if I do ....)

It is interesting you recognise this behaviour of squirreling things away as part of the OCD. When you are ready this is something you really could work on and we can support you with that at the group. 

I am pleased you are able to work from home. That must help with distraction. 

Ash asks a great question above - when we come out of this crisis what are you going to do to try and challenge an aspect of your OCD?

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2 minutes ago, Ashley said:

I can relate to that Annie, I used to do the same.  I have highlighted the word that I always come back to with my own OCD to remind myself, a feeling is not real. 

Obviously you don;t have to accept this challenge, so please don't let me pressure you into doing this if you're not ready. But, could you wear those shoes next time you go to Laura's group? Or even take them in a bag if you don't feel ready to wear out and perhaps wear them for 10 minutes of the group?     

But please, don't let me pressure you, I know with all my OCD challenges I had to get it right in my own head before I could do it.   Even if it takes you a year to get to that point, I am sure Laura and the group would be so pleased to see you in those 🥿 one day :)

we would love to support you with that!

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1 minute ago, Annie14 said:

I'll struggle with feeling the risk is only 0.1% in any circumstance.

I get ya. 

I guess that's where the beauty of creating a structure hierarchy of exposure exercises comes in helpful to slowly expose yourself to things and prove the OCD wrong.   Don't worry, I know this is all stuff you will know, and if it helps it took me months to face some of my fears. :) 

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35 minutes ago, Ashley said:

So my first question back at you is when this is all over, what are you going to do to try and challenge this aspect of your OCD?  😉  That's how we roll on here Laura, we like to get each other thinking and answering :)

 

Ash... I might try letting someone down in a little way and not apologising for it! This is very hard for me!

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