12 year old son to be admitted to psychiatric unit

[Cesca]

I wondered if anyone could advise. My 12 yr old son has OCD, he was in private treatment last summer but had a sort of breakdown in November and CAMHS got involved. His OCD had stopped him eating and drinking and he wouldn’t leave the sofa. I managed to get him eating again with some accommodating OCD. His treatment with CAMHS since February has been hit an miss. He was prescribed medication but I have no clue if it’s working, he was supposed to have CBT weekly but appointments are hit and miss and it apparently hasn’t worked. He was supposed to see a psychologist but has seen her twice in 8 weeks and now CAMHS have decided he needs referring to hospital as they can’t help in the community. They suggest he has ASD but I’m unclear about this. I feel like hospital is the last place he should be as he is a very young, sensitive 12 year old and I fear what will happen if he is taken from home. I accept he is very poorly and distressed and have asked CAMHS to look at alternatives but there seems to be very limited options, I desperately want my son treated at home where he feels safe but I seem to have no choice. I worry that he will be so traumatised if he is hospitalised. I’m also not convinced about the level of care he’ll get given the experience so far. No one seems to be able to deal with OCD at this level and they’ve left him and us to a point where he can barely leave the house, he hasn’t been to school and his weight is very low. GP not interested and I feel like I’m screaming but no one is listening to me. I’ve read various books and materials, private therapists no won’t assist because he’s with CAMHS and I know I am his mum but I also know him best.

[snowbear]

Hi Cesca,

It sounds like things are quite stressful at the moment. What you need is for somebody to look at the whole situation, listen to your concerns and come up with a plan of action. Usually that's your GP, so it's a shame your doctor is out of his/her depth with this.

I suspect the main concern for the CAMHS team will be his weight and the usual way they deal with low body weight is by hospitalization where he can be supervised on an eating plan (as is done for anorexics.) As you say, you're his mum and know him best, so perhaps if you could come up with a plan to increase his weight by a certain amount in the next week or two that would demonstrate to CHAMS that he can be safely managed at home?

Is your son aware of the intention to hospitalise him? What does he think about that? I understand your concern about it traumatising him, but sometimes OCD can have a stronger grip at home than elsewhere. Typically there's a desire to protect that safe place more than anywhere else which results in maximum rituals while at home. The familiarity of a daily routine can also encourage or sustain OCD behaviours and it's possible he might find the change of setting frees him from some of his more habit-like compulsions. In other words, try not to view hospitalization as potentially traumatising, rather see it as potentially liberating for him.

I would not accept that his CBT has failed to achieve results.   I would contend that the lack of consistency in it's delivery has failed your son. CBT is hard work and needs commitment from both the sufferer and the therapist. Pointless giving him one or two hit and miss sessions and expecting it to get results. At some point he will need further CBT, minimum 6 weeks of weekly therapy and likely much longer. If CAMHS aren't offering this it's something you could take up with our OCD-UK office who might be able to assist you negotiate the right sort of CBT in the right amounts. You can contact the office by email at ashley@ocduk.org or by phone on the helpline 01332 588112 between 9.30am and 3.30pm Mon-Fri.

It's great that you've read up on OCD yourself. The better informed you are the more you can support and help your son. You'll have noticed the books talk about not colluding with compulsions and ideally this is the way to proceed. However, in my opinion at this point in time it's most important you get your son to talk to you. Find out what his fears are and from there you can work with him to identify what his compulsions are and form a hierarchy of which ones could be tackled first. If you can loosen the grip his compulsions have bit by bit that will help greatly.

You are in the best place to decide what area needs tackled first, but I suggest looking at what his compulsions are around eating (or rather not eating) and see if there's anything can be done to improve matters there. OCD thinking can be complex and it may be about food preparation, or the food itself, or even how his body reacts to food (for example, if he doesn't eat he doesn't need the toilet and so avoids compulsions around toileting.) The only way to get to the bottom of where the problem lies is to talk to him.

I hope that gives you some ideas to start, and helps you feel listened to and less alone. We're here for you if you have further questions as you go through your son's treatment alongside him.

Most importantly, during this stressful time remember to take care of your own physical and mental health. Take a break for an hour or two each day, do something for you that recharges your batteries. Sometimes just a brief walk in the fresh air can restore your perspective and reduce stress.

[ATL]

Hi, my son is also 12. 3 or 4 years back he had lots of issues with not eating, luckily after around a year he did start eating again, it's only over the past 6 months that its become clear he has ocd, which has made me think the not eating must have been ocd related as well.

Anyway, the point of my post is that it might be an idea to get in touch with each other to explore whether our sons may want to be in contact, if they're going through similar. From what I've read, ocd doesn't spread through support groups so they wouldn't make each other worse! I'm new to this forum, I assume there's a pm facility, if you might be interested just let me know.

I hope your son is ok. I'm currently reading a book I would recommend called Brain Lock, if you haven't already come across it 

[Caramoole]

Hi ATL and a big  to the forum.  I'm sorry that the circumstances are because of your Sons OCD

1 hour ago, ATL said:

From what I've read, ocd doesn't spread through support groups so they wouldn't make each other worse! 

You'd like to think so but this isn't necessarily so.  Sometimes it can if it's the wrong sort of support

2 hours ago, ATL said:

assume there's a pm facility, if you might be interested just let me know.

Gosh......I'm going to sound like a right old grumpy here We do have a PM facility but strongly advise it's not used to share support generally.  We do this because it is very common for advice to be wrong (albeit well-intentioned) for the sharing to happen in a way that actually perpetuates OCD, particularly in respect of reassurance seeking.  It's natural to seek comfort  but sometimes it can work out that it's harmful to recovery.  Keeping posts on the forum ensures that a broad range of advice and experience is offered but that we can be sure that it's the right, appropriate advise that will help them get well.  I appreciate that it's more difficult for youngsters, up until only a few weeks ago we had a dedicated young persons forum but consolidated it because it was virtually never used.

I hope we are able to help you and your Son to help you with issues relating to his OCD