Update?

[Summer9173]

Hello everybody, I just thought I’d give an update on everything  my brother is currently staying at a local hospital and is waiting to get a bed from a mental health hospital. It can be anywhere around the country but I do hope it’s closeFor the sake of my mental health however, I have decided not to see him in person yet. I feel like if I did everything would become too much of a reality and I need to distance myself from bad thing’s right now as I’ve just came out of a depressive episode myself. I’m really trying to avoid things that make me anxious and depressed while I wait for my medication to kick in, I hope my brother understandsmy mind state is very fragile too and my parents aren’t really there to help me either due to my brother so I really need to walk carefully for myself and be the person I go too x 

 Have you ever been in such a bad place though like anxiety and depression wise your terrified of going back to that awful place? Or like letting yourself slip back to that place? I’m so terrified to feel those horrible emotions i once did  but I’m so determined to get better and I have a lot more faith in myself now I think I just need some time to just feel calm and not all these horrible emotions. I think it’s important to practice self care in the darkest of days. I try and speak to myself as though I’d speak to my friends (not literally) but by complimenting myself and saying I’m amazing at this and that and it’s like the ocd bully in my head when I do that gets a little smaller

It’s going to be a tough journey, I’m just so lucky I found this forum as my ocd family

[ThomasOCD]

Hi ! I see You are doing better Your brother need time to recover himself before he can be with family so it's best for him to get some peace with professional help.

I used to think about going back to awful emotions and obsessions too, but they are long gone. Now I see them as demons I defeated and there is no point of leting them come again.  Besides I understand those emotions and feelings that caused me to have so much problems that I am not affraid of them, so this keeps me away from them. It's like with panic attacks the more you think of them because you are affraid, they are going to comeback, but once you understand that you are no longer affraid of them there is less chance that they will come back. Understand them or if you need help to understand them, get some good therapist to help you. Keeping positive and not looking back at this moments is the best way to stay healthy.  You should get more involved in Your hobbies and social life and thing will change for better. And of course don't forget about our ocd community

[Juliex]

Summer you sound like you're becoming stronger all the time to me.  You are absolutely right to take care of yourself first.  In fact your brother may learn something from your approach to this and your care of yourself.  You sound like you will do this in a sensitive way and that's all that's needed.  When you talk I hear someone who is developing really good coping strategies and while the horrible feelings are still something you may fear, you are gradually developing the resilience that will one day make you realise you'll never quite go to that horrible place again.  My experience is that over the years things improved because if ever I had an episode, I had more strategies for coping each time.  I don't fear those dark times anymore.  That doesn't mean they'll never happen, though I now think its unlikely.  But if it did, I kind of know I'd get through it now.  I hear a lot of strength in you and I am optimistic for you.