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Everything posted by ThomasOCD

  1. Hi, did anyone else expirienced as I call it „ocd attacks” ? For example when I manage to win with ocd by ruminating and I finally have relief because I figured out everything then OCD hits with intrusive doubt and false memory about rumination I just managed to beat ? When I’m not paying attention to this ”ocd attacks” ocd will come up with other doubts and intrusive thoughts. The only way I managed to beat this is to let all this „ocd attacks” just be there until they lose power.
  2. @PolarBearYes, That’s how I started with 5mg for a week and now 10mg. When I started taking 5mg I had to help my self with Benzodiazepines because my anxiety and depression was really bad, but when I started taking 10mg it’s way better I still do the compulsions and I ruminate but it’s much much less with less anxiety than before. This my 14th day on SSRI.
  3. @MthecatladyYou should speak to Your doctor about it for sure, some people have to take higher doses such as 15mg or 20mg. Worst thing about SSRI is waiting for the meds to kick in and sometimes getting the right dose, for me 10mg seems well. Escitalopram is stronger than citalopram.
  4. @MthecatladyI live in Poland so some medications may have different names, I started taking escitalopram 5mg for 7 days at night now I’m on 10mg this is my 11th day and I already feel the difference, I also take the smallest dose possible of Ketrel(Quetiapine) 12,5mg for sleeping also at night, the lowest dose is 25mg so I have to split the tablet in half on my own. How long have You been taking medication ? SSRI start to work between 2-4 weeks. Some people feel the medication Working later than other
  5. Hi everyone, I would like to share with You that I started CBT and I also started to take medication for my OCD and other personality disorders. I never thought that CBT and medication can help with my severe OCD, it has been a second week on „escitalopram” SSRI medication and it really helped me to look at my OCD completly different way ! I also smile more often and I’m happier through the day. CBT helped me to see why there is no point in engaging in compulsions and what wrong with my thinking pattern. Also it took down my anxiety a bit so I can see these intrusive obsessions differently because anxiety does not put a negative filter on my obsessions. I really recommend taking medication and starting CBT. I also take medication for a good sleep, I’m better but I still have much to learn.
  6. @Tamagochi Wow! That’s a Proper explanation! Thumbs up from me!
  7. The tingling You are feeling in Your chest and groin is not arousal it may feel like it, but this is OCD common trick it may feel pleasurable in Your body but this doesn’t mean You like your thoughts or what are You seeing that is causing this feeling. The more You are trying to feel attraction to woman, ocd will block this feeling I had this happen to me as well. Well the erection You get it may be just a random blood flow while sleeping or more You are affraid of having one then You might get one this is how OCD works. Any sexual thought or dream may cause physical arousal, primitive part of the brain doesn’t care who is in this dream it just cares that the dream is sexual in nature
  8. @SavyDon’t pay attention to this thoughts my went away and I feel much better, now when I think of these kind of thoughts I see them as wierd and illogical and I let them go. I hope You have a good day !
  9. @SavyI had the same problem, you feel like you don’t feel that these thoughts are wrong and this scares You, so You are scared because these thoughts are wrong. So don’t worry just let the thoughts go You don’t need to engage in this kind of thoughts.
  10. @MiniYes, people without ocd also get this thoughts and urges but they don’t pay attention to them. This is our problem that we pay attention to this thoughts, That’s how we feed our OCD.
  11. Don’t worry that you got aroused to a 13 years old sometimes our brain see something sexual in nature and makes us aroused this is normal for everyone, this is how our brain works sometimes. The therapist That told You it was fantasy doesn’t know anything about OCD. Don’t worry this is just intrusive thoughts, intrusive urges, sensations feelings etc. You have POCD, there are many links with medical Articles about it I can send You. Look for OCD therapist and try medication, also look up some ocd books! This is the key to get over this nightmare.
  12. @MiniYes I did even worst then that, I was doubting myself if I am going crazy or what if this is how it’s supposed to be that people are made for harming each other and more and more I was so affraid. But then I realised it’s just random thoughts that don’t make sense and my OCD was giving me this thoughts and intrusive impulses to make me anxious and to keep ruminating. It feels real because this disorder wants us to keep ruminating. Try not to argue with this thoughts and impulses
  13. @FlyingRocket for me it does, because when my obsessions went away and I thought about would l Like to do this ? The answer was no, but when it came back and I asked myself would I do it I SAY no but in a confusion which makes my anxiety worst but this is how ocd works it will do anything to make you ruminate.
  14. @PolarBearI live in Poland now so I was lucky, I have been given good medications that took my depression and anxiety away and made me understand a lot what’s going on with me.
  15. you may enjoyed physical sensations/arousal and you associated this to the thought which gave you this Groinal response so this tricks you into believing you like this thoughts. Sometimes when You try to feel this anxious feeling to confirm you don’t like the thoughts so OCD blocks the anxiety so You mistake this for liking.
  16. @PolarBearRight now I’m in ambulance waiting to see a specialist.
  17. Yes but I think it may have been an erection from my girlfriend which I always have when I go to sleep next to Her, I had this wierd thought and I accept it but then I felt this erection going on and I accept it and thought to suprise my ocd „it feels good it physical arousal it supposed to feel good and I felt pleasurable feeling in my body” and accept it but then I realised what might have given me this erection so I had anxiety but I felt a sleep. It hurts much. But maybe I associated this arousal to thought, which tricks me into believing that I had it from the thought which I accepted.
  18. Yesterday I had a bad day, when I was l lying next to my girlfriend and had this memory of being on a party, it was Fun with my friend and I had this wierd thought about penis and I accept it and felt like yeah whatever and I felt erection coming up but I accept it as well and I felt this physical arousal so I thought I am accepting this as well and I thought „it feels good yeah” I know that physical arousal is pleasurable this is how we are designed but After I accept it and felt pleasurable physical arousal I felt bad anxiety and I felt a sleep, in the morning I still had a anxiety of the roof it makes me feel bad really bad. Accepting and telling yourself it feels fine to make it go is bad I hate it my anxiety is really bad now. I had to take medication to calm down my anxiety Does this make me not straight ?
  19. Hello I know I post almost everyday but my depression seems worse everyday. What happens to me I take the memory of my girlfriend Her voice and everything she was doing and put it into another person and then I check do I feel the same about it, I am worried that I can feel the same feelings for someone else as well, which OCD tries to tricks me that I feel the same. I feel like OCD is trying to take the only thing I have. Can anyone help me with these OCD tricks ?
  20. @TamagochiYou really helped me to understand things clearly, I have this thought about a person do the same sex that I used to have false attraction to noe when I check to this thought I force myself to feel that happy/excitement feeling and Groinal response and then I quickly change to sexual thought that gives me pleasurable sexual arousal and feelings and then I compare this feelings but they seem almost the same which gives me depression and panic, but I understand that this feeling may be confused.
  21. Hi, I’ve been posting so mamy posts which I hate to do but I have the worst depression of my life! I don’t eat, I don’t go outside nothing. I have really bad thoughts, I imagine myself in my sexual fantasy with a Girl and feel attraction and desire and arousal, then this thought is pushed to the side and I get intrusive thought about someone I have false attraction to but at the same time that person in my mind is smiling so this causes me to have postitive feelings just because that person is smiling, so I compare this feelings and I know I have Real arousal/attraction to my sexual fantasy but then I look at the intrusive thought and Feel this false attraction which feels Real because of the likeable physical feeling it gives me, like it doesn’t match the thought and it feels really scary, I was crying and shaking the whole day and I can’t figure out whats what, I have really bad depression lowest of the low. can anyone help me Please ? I’m seeing therapist tommorow.
  22. Typical OCD with Numbers and magical thinking and confirmation bias. I had that as well with number 26! Where ever I went i saw 26, all the bad thoughts I had there was always number 26 somwhere around, The worst things I done accidently was on 26th day of the month with my friend who was 26 years old! I even dropped playing cards and I thought „that would be really scary if those where these Numbers” So i picked them up and and there they were card nr. 2 and 6, I was adding and multiplying numbers just to see if I get number 26 and if anything bad happened at that time. It went away once I realised that things like that happen everywhere just other people don’t notice them and don’t care.
  23. It’s like these emotions/feelings don’t match the thought amd it feels like I have to enjoy the thought I hate and I don’t want to enjoy.
  24. Worst is that OCD is trying to tell me that these two feelings are the same. Sometimes I get false attraction with intrusive thoughts when I have normal sexual fantasy with my own thoughts. Sometimes is hard to seperate them and I panic and get really depressed, ocd messes with my mind so much that I’ve been crying like a kid all day.
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