Chels

@Angst thank you. I have a partner but he is completely unsupportive towards my mental health I actually feel so alone he just doesn’t want to know he actually gets annoyed about my OCD . Iv had OCD for a very long time. But it’s definitely spiked now. I’m so scared

@gael I’m only on 10mg I definitely feel like I need to increase it. It’s awful this. I’m really struggling I’m on waiting list for more CBT but it’s going to be at least January I’m not sure what to do in the meantime.

I haven’t came on here for reassurance but some advice. I am seeing a psychologist at present. I am already on Citalopram. I am a new mum who has been through a very traumatic time of recent. I am getting intrusive thoughts which are really effecting me to the point I wouldn’t even tell people (not even psychologist) as they are what I would call ‘warped’ or ‘sick’. Now I know they mean nothing but they’re making me think I’m going crazy and that I am going to lose my mind and end up with post partum psychosis. I also feel like I can’t even go out in public as I am so so anxious and full of dread . Please can someone help or advise me

Not yet no but I am seeing the psychologist tomorrow morning I’m scared to tell her

I am a new mum and feel like my intrusive thoughts are trying to come back but ruin my bond with her before it’s even begun. I have suffered with intrusive thoughts and now convincing myself baby looks like someone iv overthought about (she doesn’t and I don’t think that) but it’s making me think she does and I’m starting to panic thinking what if I this effects my bond or makes me think I can’t look at her . These thoughts have affected my relationship for the past 5 years I don’t want it effecting this special time in my life with my beautiful baby.

@snowbear thank you for this, think I have to pay better attention to what else I’m attaching to it like you say. I will try my hardest. Thank you for your lengthy reply it means a lot to me. I appreciate your support and advice. Hopefully I can do it. I just want to be happy.

@Marko2020 sorry for the late response. He doesn’t give me reassurance. He just says ‘I don’t want to know, deal with it yourself’ he doesn’t ask what it is I don’t tell him. I feel like I know a lot about OCD but can’t help myself. It’s so sad.

@snowbear hi sorry for the late response. i try so hard to say to myself ‘it means nothing’ i get on with my day i switch my thought to something else i try my hardest to pay no attention to it. It just doesn’t seem to MOVE!! It’s just like there from waking up to going to sleep. Even at my happiest moments, it’s just there. I feel like this is just stuck there. It’s like part of my life now. Honestly I feel like one day I will give up on life because of it. I don’t even have anything left in me. I know the thought means nothing I do know that. I don’t sit and go over and over it, it just seems to be stuck there. I haven’t got anymore therapy lined up. I feel like the NHS therapists haven’t got a clue. They don’t understand me and probably make me feel worse. Iv researched it for years and know what I need to do just can’t seem to put that into practice - even though I think I’m doing everything to do so, it doesn’t seem to be working at all. I just ignore it for so long and after months it just doesn’t go away so I end up erupting as I think I’m trying and it’s STILL there and I’m STILL noticing it. I honestly don’t have any hope that I will ever get past this?

I wrote the exact same post 2 years ago about the exact same thing, it hasn’t gone away… how????

I have had OCD now for a lot of years. I have had many ‘forms’. The most common being when I am in a relationship, obsessing over my past, their past and my exes or other people. I have been with my partner a number of years now. At the beginning of the relationship when we weren’t ‘serious’ or in a ‘relationship’ as such, I spoke to someone else via message and have lived to regret it ever since. My current partner is aware and it really upsets/annoys/angers him. I feel eaten up with guilt and this has caused me to obsess constantly 24/7. I constantly think of the name of the person (that’s it but it’s always there this has went on for years). During sex I worry about this if the name pops into my head. During fun times, it just doesn’t go away. It’s really ruining my life. I thought after Al of these years it would go away. I also confess that I am overthinking to my partner and he always knows what it will be about, this is going to be my life forever now. I can’t take anymore. Iv had therapy in the past I don’t feel like it works no matter who I speak to they can’t stop me from thinking. It’s always going to be there. It’s torture I don’t know how I’m going to ever get through this. I don’t know what else to do or where to turn. Please can anyone help? There’s so much more to this but this is shortened down.

I know that I should keep things to myself it’s silly things but I’m being so selfish by telling my partner. I scroll pay something on social media nothing in particular but because the name of the user looked similar to one I sometimes overthink about, I had to scroll back to check… it’s stupid I know that, why did I have to confess this!? I need to work harder on NOT confessing and just not worrying about thoughts in general! It is so hard! I am so much better than I ever was but still not where I want to be

@NotRock it’s so much easier said than done. I just feel like it will never go away

Hi, just wondering how long ‘obsessions’ last. I don’t like calling it an obsession as it isn’t actually something I’m obsessed with, completely the opposite to be honest! It’s just a random person, not even anything sexual etc just literally even the name or the person pictured in my head from my past who I didn’t care about but because I know my partner is bothered about or should I say was bothered about this event it sort of clings onto it, if this makes sense? Sort of like OCD is purposely trying to put it in my head to make me worry that I MUST tell my partner, but it’s been constant now for months and I’m starting to worry more. I have tried everything but not sure if this is normal for it to last for so long?

Just want to say I am in the same boat. I have confessed so much to my partner even when they didn’t want to know and now they sort of hold that against me as it hurt them. So iv made a rod for my own back. But that doesn’t stop me from wanting to confess more, which makes me sound really selfish but honestly I’m not. The OCD is so strong sometimes I just have to say it. It’s awful, I do so well then sometimes it’s that bad I think they need to know as it could change whether or not they want to carry on the relationship with me and I need to give them that choice

Thank you for your reply @NotRock I appreciate your response but the fact your the only one that replied send my anxiety high once again. I understand what you are saying, I have had professional help previously in the way of CBT probably about 3 times now and it just doesn’t help me at all. I understand confessing is the problem and I have minimised this A LOT from previous.. but the same thought is still there no matter what. It’s driving me crazy. I have no one to turn to. I’m awaiting more CBT which personally I think won’t work, as it hasn’t before. I have come on this forum quite a few times and I don’t get much feedback or advice from anyone which is really disheartening