Lynz

It's up to you but could you perhaps take your meds at a different time during the day e.g. afternoon or evening, if your intrusive thoughts/gagging are worse in the morning?

Nope I wouldn't retake it. Even though you have thrown up there is a chance some of it still would have been absorbed therefore if you take anymore you may be overdosing. I would skip it for today and if you still throw up after taking your next dose tomorrow then call your GP.

That's amazing well done

I would just let this one go. Your partner likely knows already that this was an OCD thing so any further confessions about it will just cause more issues between the two of you. You recognise that you have performed a compulsion by trying to find out how long he has had an iCloud account for which is an important first step. I definitely would try and accept that yes you have slipped up a bit regarding the OCD, but do try and put this episode behind you now and move forward. Your partner doesn't need to know every last detail of your thoughts that led to you asking him about his iCloud account so confessing those would be pointless and only serve to cause further issues.

I'm just thankful that I've never suffered from this theme because as a former nurse there is no way on earth that I'd ever do anything like that

Yes you're probably right. I know what it's like though to completely lose sight of what is reasonable when dealing with an obsession so hopefully the OP has an insight now into what people who don't worry about this particular theme do when using public toilets.

What I do - If the toilet seat looks clean I will sit on it. If not I'll wipe it with some toilet paper. If there is poo on the seat I won't use that toilet but will choose another that looks clean. If there is a bit of urine I will wipe it with some toilet paper or if it's at the back of the seat I just won't sit on that bit. I tend to not pay much attention to the rest of the cubicle/floor and how clean that is unless it is majorly dirty like it's covered in poo or blood (I've seen a few female toilets in that state haha). I can't hover any more as I've had pelvic surgery so I just have to sit on the seat. After flushing I'll use my hands to open the door as normal, then wash my hands if there is soap available and dry them using whatever is available (hand dryers or paper towels). After my hands are dry I'll then maybe use my sleeve to touch the door handle to leave the public toilets (this step is probably not necessary but I feel like I have to do it). If there is no soap available then I'll use hand gel which I have in my bag after leaving the public toilets entirely. I won't use hand gel in addition to washing with soap and water.

Hi Jen I'm really sorry your family are being so difficult. Do you have any other support you can lean on at the moment, such as a partner or friends? I do think you have every right to be upset as not only are you having to deal with a newborn baby you are also having to deal with severe postpartum OCD which isn't nice and IMO your family should be more supportive. I'm glad you're seeing a counsellor and are now feeling a bit better, and congratulations on your new arrival as well With your family, although it is not an excuse there may be a chance that they are ignorant and don't understand what OCD is like, and don't realise how much you have been struggling. If they're not responding to your calls then I would perhaps send them a message or email outlining exactly why you've been struggling and why you haven't been to see them. State all of this in a calm manner. This then leaves the ball in their court whether they get back in touch with you and at least you have been clear and upfront with them.

Hey Summer, put it this way - if you don't go then there's only one guaranteed outcome - you will feel terribly guilty about it and will feel low because you've let your OCD win, and your partner will also be upset too. However, if you do go then yes there is a slim chance that you won't enjoy yourself and all those things you fear may come true, but there is an even greater chance that your worries will be unfounded and that you will have a good time. Snowbear is right about catastrophic thinking. If you want to go home for whatever reason from the party then you can just go home, but at least you can say you gave it a good go. So many worries that we have are about overinflating the risk of bad things happening. Once we can recognise this and work on not letting this fear control us then we start to take our life back from OCD.

I just thought I would pick up on this and point out that it's not true. I used to work with elderly people in hospitals and in the community. You would not believe the amount of people I saw who had grown up children who would never ever visit them or look after them at all, so sadly the idea that having kids means that you will have someone to look after you when you're old is completely false. I'm not saying that you should or shouldn't have kids but if that is the main reason then you could end up being disappointed

You make me laugh jonesy I'm exactly the same. Maybe we're both perverts who knows?

Your baby absolutely won't be taken away. You should be referred to the perinatal mental health team as you're experiencing mental health problems soon after giving birth. I would also contact your health visitor as well as they may be able to offer you additional support. Make sure you tell the GP exactly how you've been feeling. Don't worry about how you will be perceived as this sort of thing is so common in new mothers after having a baby. That is why there are so many support services available.

Keep on chipping away at it, NLL. You can do this

Say it out loud "scan the (de) navy in"

Me too . It was only when I read it out to my husband that I actually got it.

Your thinking is so warped on this. You haven't even done anything wrong. All you did was literally speak to another woman and you have equated that interaction in your mind with actual cheating. Your thought-action fusion is going absolutely bonkers here, NLL. I just wish you could see it as clearly as we all do. Are you still taking your medication? If so I'm wondering if maybe you need to try a different med or increase your dosage? Something to discuss with your GP anyway.

That's good. I do hope things get easier for you all x

NLL do you have a family support worker or anything like that for the issues you're having with your son?

I also wouldn't care less if my partner contacts people he knew from a while back or whatever. I think you need to try and let this one go. It's so telling that you don't seem to care about sexual fantasies anymore. It is mind boggling to me that you don't even have the tiniest bit of insight into what is going on. You're obviously quite severely unwell with OCD and I hope you can get some proper help for it soon.

OCD is just weird isn't it? Your post resonated with me because I remembered when I fancied this famous guy in a show I was watching, and then a certain facial expression he did reminded me of by grandad, and like you I started to worry that maybe I fancied my grandad after all because I fancied this guy in this show who reminded me of him. In the end I just chalked it up to my brain making weird connections, and I was able dismiss the intrusive thoughts about it as nonsense.

NLL can't you see even slightly that this is OCD? You have posted literally thousands of messages in this thread and others for months about sexual fantasies, and now all of a sudden the focus is switched from fantasises to something you said to a woman you know and you are now obsessing over that instead.

Oooh I've got one. A guy I work with has a bottom lip piercing and I randomly thought "when he takes the piercing out would the hole be big enough to see his teeth through"

I find it difficult to remember silly random thoughts that I have. Just goes to show the difference when your brain doesn't focus on certain thoughts that they just pass through your mind, whereas ones that your brain does focus on (OCD thoughts) you can remember so easily. At the moment I can't remember any of those silly random thoughts I've had lately but I do know that I've had them. Whenever I next get any popping up in my mind I'll be sure to post them in this thread.

NLL I know you don't mean it but you are not thinking clearly when you repeatedly say things like "maybe people don't know...". We have had on this thread alone 47 pages of you repeating the same thing when it comes to your fantasies and intrusive thoughts. Believe me, we know! Great news that you've got your son a job. Hopefully things will now start to get a bit easier for you all.