Bad Night With OCD And Depression

[Guest Dippy]

I hope so too.

[Guest Dippy]

I'm home on my own and think i'm gonna fall apart

[Guest h_777]

Dippy it will be ok. You will be aright.

And if you do fall apart and can't stop crying, it's not neccessarily a bad thing, remember you don't have to be strong all the time. I know it's horrible being in on your own at the best of times, but you will get through it.

Night night

I hope you manage to get some sleep

[Guest srichie1]

so sorry

[Guest liquorice]

I've been thinking of you on and off since yesterday and I'm sure all the others have been too.

[Guest Dippy]

I'm sooo stressed!!! My sister's partner is driving me up the wall!! He doesn't clean up after himself and leaves it for me to do!!! I was late for work this morning again because I had to tidy up! I'm so god damn angry :angry:

[Guest Bewildered]

Are you in work today ?

[Guest Dippy]

Yeah i'm at work. I'd rather be anywhere but home right now.

[Rachie]

Hope your day wasn't too bad today, Dippy, and you get some rest this evening.

Rach x

[Guest Dippy]

Thanks Rachie :original:

I've finished my shift now but I really don't want to go home. Hopefully i'll have a chance to rest over the weekend.

[Guest Dippy]

Had a bad last night. I couldn't come online to talk to anyone. Felt suicidal. Everything is just going wrong and now i'm worried I might lose my job because i've been late almost everyday this week even though I have made up the time.

[Guest hayley73]

Dippy your employer should understand. You have a lot to deal with right now.

I know things are bad right now - but it wouldn't be this way forever. Please find someone to talk too. You are being strong for others right now. But someone need to be strong for you. My offer of Pming me still stands. I might not be able to answer straight away. But I will answer.

[Rachie]

Hi Dippy,

You have told your employer what's happened, haven't you? I am sure they wouldn't even expect you to be coming in to work right now if you have, and I doubt they can be annoyed with you for being late.

Why don't you have a chat with your boss about it if you're worried?

You are bound to have bad nights Dippy. It must be hell for you but as Hayley says, this won't last forever.

Take care,

Rach x

[Guest Dippy]

My manager knows all about what's been going on, i've been open and honest with them from the start. I can't help but worry though.

I hope this passes soon as I don't think I can take much more.

Thanks for the offer Hayley :original:

[Guest hayley73]

You are so welcome Dippy. Keep telling reminding yourself how well you are doing. Do something nice for yourself over the weekend. You deserve it. LOOK AFTER YOURSELF. You will not be in a postion to help others if you do not take care of yourself.

[Guest Dippy]

As i've said before, on the outside I act ok and like nothings wrong but on the inside i'm falling apart. I get moments when I could be in a room full of people like I am now but feel very very alone.

[Guest hayley73]

I know that feeling so well. I have a wonderful family - husband and 3 kids to keep me busy. But, at times I feel so lonely. I think this is partly depression. My husband says he feels like this at times too.

You really need to open up to someone. If people always see the 'happy' Dippy how do they know how you are really feeling unless you say?

People found it hard to believe that I was depressed and really suffering a few years back. I always gave the appearance to a happy, coping single mum. Some where shocked to discover how I was really feeling. You certainly find out who your friends are at times like that. Thank God I had some good friends who really saw me through.

I think keeping busy is good. But rest is important too. Your body and mind needs rest in order to re-build itself.

Even just telling 1 person how you are feeling can make the problems seem just a little better.

I have heard it said that when someone first loses someone they go into shock mode. I felt like that when my Nan first died. I wanted to be strong for my Grandad and my mum. Even now 7 years on, it hurts. I think grieving is part of the healing process. Allow yourself this. Remember its ok to cry. Its the bodys way of realising tension.

[Guest Dippy]

I have tried opening up to people but i'm worried i'm going to scare them and they won't want to know me! I opened up to a girl whom I had a crush on at the time and she now hardly ever speaks to me.

On the surface I appear i'm coping but deep down i'm really not. I do try and keep busy but it all catches up with me when I stop.

I feel I am right now finding out exactly who my real friends are, it's not a nice thing as someone I really opened up to now knows alot about me but she want's nothing to do with me so now I feel an idiot!

Just had a chat with my manager and everything is ok.

Edited May 26, 2006 by Guest

[Rachie]

Good that the chat with your manager went well - what did he or she say?

[Guest Dippy]

She knows what's going on at home at the moment and I just explained that i'm finding things difficult which is causing me to not sleep much etc. I have promised I will sort out my time keeping and she accepted that.

[Guest Dippy]

Just found out my cat needs an operation as he has a lump on his neck. There's a chance he could have cancer!

[Guest HayleyMartin]

ahhhh honey

how much **** are you having to put up with.....i'm screaming for you

just sending my love i guess it can only get better - it can't get worse ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

[Guest liquorice]

The lump might also be benign, keep your head out of the water ! Most lumps are benign, wait for the vet results before stressing yourself even more, you have enough on your plate.

Are your nephew and niece your sister's kids ?

The lump might also be benign, keep your head out of the water ! Most lumps are benign, wait for the vet results before stressing yourself even more, you have enough on your plate.

Are your nephew and niece your sister's kids ?

[Guest Dippy]

Had a bit of a bad day with the kids today. My nephew was playing up and has been in a funny mood. My niece keeps following me everywhere.

[Guest hayley73]

Hi Dippy

You are doing an excellent job with the kids - I'm sure they are appreciating every thing you are doing for them. How old are they?

They must be feeling the loss of their Mum. Kids have a funny way of expressing distress and sadness. Being naughty is unfortunately one way and following around and being clingy to an adult is another. We have had problems with my 5 year old stepson. Behaviour problems at both home and school. We put it down to the fact that his mum left him (and doesn't see him). She left when he was 2. It must have been really confusing for him as he didn't know what was going on or how to express himself. Things do seem to be improving with him now though. Kids are tough cookies with a bit of love and understanding.

How are you doing?

I read about your cat. Please don't worry. It could be beign. Cross the bridge when you come to it. Don't overload yourself.