It's hard when it feels real

[ocdsufferer85]

I find it so hard when OCD throws back memories of moments that are blown up no doubt but it still feels real

And in the moment that I feel my fear took over it felt real, it felt like I was gonna do the thing I fear

It tells me I wanted to, or I was bad.

It's told me so much that the tiny event that had no intent behind it has spiralled into a massive load of guilt and shame and the lies have made a huge web 

I can't be the only one who feels like their OCD fear was about to or happened, it keeps going because it keeps blaming me 

I want to hear peoples stories and how they came to a point or several points where they felt they acted on their fear even though it's not what they want (or it wouldn't be a fear)

Fearing you have become your...biggest fear... is the worst part of it 

 

[PolarBear]

No. That's not the worst part. 

The worst part is, after all this time, you still believing that uttering those words is such a terrible thing.