Lost_in_a_Dark_Maze

Hi Felix, I know you are right, it's just that I haven't left the house or seen anyone face to face (except my mum who I live with) for 7 years. I was terrified of going to the dentist before, but now it feels impossible. I have other health problems I should see a doctor about too. I am having an assessment for telephone therapy next month. Just hoping that will help.

Well done! You have done amazingly well with all the challenges you have faced, and it's great that you would like to stay longer. You have my sympathy with the PMDD. It's my worst week of the month and I've been a ball of rage at times. Luckily I have my medicine again now though. I'm sorry you've had such awful weather for your last day. Good luck tomorrow!

How was the rest of your week?

Thank you, Angst. I suspected as much, but as I am often wrong when it comes to these things, I thought I'd check. On this occasion it is actually me with the rotting teeth and someone else who doesn't want my cup in the kitchen. I normally use disposable cups (because of my own OCD fears), but have run out of clean ones so wanted to rinse one. My teeth are bad because I haven't been looking after them. I desperately need to see a dentist, but cannot face it yet.

If someone has badly rotting teeth, so a lot of bacteria in their mouth, is it normal hygiene or OCD not to let them rinse their cup in the kitchen sink? Many thanks in advance for any insight.

That's fantastic, well done you!

Yes, it's Fluoxetine. It's only a small dose that I've been on since about age 14. It did calm me down a bit then. I'm not sure how much it does now, but I do seem to be worse if I miss a dose, even though it's supposed to have a long half life. I meant to say, I think I have PMDD too. Anyway, these are for you. Don't let anyone make you forget how much you're achieving!! P.S. Say hello to the sea for me.

You're definitely not alone. Everything you've described could so easily be me!! I totally get the anger thing. It really sucks, and feels uncontrollable. You're actually doing very well to be on the holiday doing things! P.S. I'm OK, but forgot to order my repeat prescription on time, so will run out before I get it. My mum is cross as she's the one who has to live with me!!

Me! I can very much relate. I'm sorry you're finding things so difficult. It's a lot to cope with, being in a new place, change of routine. I always find that makes my OCD worse. Is this your first night?

I would imagine that if you explained your circumstances they would exempt you from jury service.

I think it is standard procedure. I had to send in ID documents before I received the 'How Your Disability Affects You' form.

I've perhaps misunderstood. (Something I unfortunately do rather a lot!) Just to clarify, I didn't mean to imply that there haven't always been many very compassionate and empathetic people on this forum.

I am very happy that there has been a shift towards greater empathy and recognising that other conditions and circumstances affect sufferers ability to recover from OCD. I have been upset in the past by some users being told that they aren't trying hard enough.

I'm afraid I don't have any advice, but I just wanted to say I hope you are able to enjoy your holiday once you get there. It's great that you are going. P.S. You're going to be in my neck of the woods!

Yes, I speak to her on the phone and through messages on my online account. Best of luck with the house move and your UC application. I hope you get a work coach as nice as mine.

Thanks . No, at this stage it's all been done on the phone and with them contacting my doctor. My work coach at the JobCentre is lovely and she's sorted it all out for me without me having to see anyone face to face.

Just an update. I received my first Universal Credit payment today! I'm also filling out the How Your Disability Affects You form for PIP.

Thanks BelAnna. I hadn't thought of it like that - I'll imagine myself as Neil Armstrong next time. (It makes perfect sense btw.) I hope you're feeling a bit better now.

Hi BelAnna, Any reduction in compulsions is a step in the right direction, so well done! How are you finding the EMDR? I'm hoping it will be helpful long term. I'm planning to ask for CBT once we've moved out. I have been outside a few more times - just a few steps from the front door still so far, but then I go back in without any extra cleaning or clothes changing.

How are you doing now? I hope their return wasn't too stressful for you. I'm with you on the not feeling safe. Thank you, that would be good. It probably won't be a hotel as it will take quite a while, maybe a short term let.

Yep, that's the one! Well done for not googling! I think it's normal to be anxious, us worriers just take it that bit further! I'm doing a bit better, thanks. Made it just outside my house now. I'm soon going to have to go and stay somewhere else for a while though, which I'm terrified about!

If it's the one I think it is, it may not be norovirus at all. What can you do to distract yourself? P.S. Good news about your mum, it must have been a very worrying day waiting.

Yes, I know I'm not actually going to fall into the sky. I think it's more of a feeling than a thought. I don't know.

Thank you both for your messages. It wasn't yet dark, so I didn't see any stars. (Not that I would anyway with my eyesight!) I'm not sure if it's part of my agoraphobia, but looking at the sky scares me - I feel like I'm falling into it. I always keep my ears open, but for sounds of 'danger'.