BelAnna

Hi Melibee, to the forum! I'm sorry you're having such a difficult time with OCD. What form does your hair obsession take? There is a condition called 'Body Dysmorphic Disorder', which causes obsessions with appearance so I'm wondering if it might be that? Your fears of fires and of people breaking into your house sound more like typical OCD. The main treatment for OCD is Cognitive Behavioural Therapy so it's definitely worth seeing your GP, letting them know you have intrusive thoughts (for example the thought 'what if I've left the window open and someone breaks in!') and compulsions (checking) AND ask for a referral for CBT. Good luck!

I agree with Taurean!

Thank you Taurean, that's really helpful and makes sense. I'll try thinking 'so what' and try to distract myself as much as possible! Hi Polarbear, yes I think I probably am looking for reassurance. I've not had health anxiety about my own health before but do recognize that my catastrophising and allowing myself to panic are OCD. I have not been checking too much for a while, nor really googled but I'm dealing with lots of death-related intrusive thoughts. I'm torn as to whether I should see the GP or not. It's not just a spot unfortunately but several possibly unrelated issues with that part of my anatomy, which could signal something dodgy if they are connected or might be normal! I think a normal non-OCDer would be a little concerned and go for a check-up but my contamination OCD makes that problematic.

So since discovering something on my body that probably needs to be seen by a GP, i'm getting recurring thoughts that I am going to die and specifically within the next few years. I feel a gripping panic in my chest about this- is this just OCD?

Thanks Dragonfly, that's good to hear. On Friday I decided it was nothing to worry about and that an appointment in a month's time might be OK so didn't make the appointment. Then yesterday I had another little panic after finding an identical mark on the other one BUT I guess if anything that makes them more likely just to be normal marks. I keep switching between feeling fine and panicking that there's something wrong. I really hope that i'm not ill but also that I'm not starting with health anxiety because that would be a pain! I have such issues with going to the GP practice that I only really want to go if there is a real risk of it being BC and/or if the GP will refer me for an ultrasound!

Thanks guys, that makes sense. I'm not so much using distraction as a way to totally avoid the thoughts but rather as a way to stop ruminating/worrying! So whilst acknowledging the purple elephant (i.e. if you try not to think of a purple elephant then you cannot help but think about just how purple and elephanty it is!) I use distraction techniques to focus my attention elsewhere.

Oh playstation sounds good- I think we got rid of ours unfortunately! I might try other games though and other forum users might find them a useful distraction too. What kind of writing do you enjoy? fiction or writing journals/both? I've been keeping journals recently but might try some creative writing as it's less introspective / likely to end up being about my OCD! Thanks Gingerbreadgirl! that's really helpful!

Hello, Just that really- which distraction techniques/activities do you find most helpful when you are trying to shift your focus from OCD?

Thank you so much Dksea, this was really helpful and I'm sorry for not replying at the time. I'm so glad you're well but that must have been scary for you. It's so difficult in these situations because even some normal non-OCDers would panic a bit! The OCD definitely latches onto the doubt though- if something is possible, however unlikely then the OCD plays on it. I've not had a GP check yet but will book one this week. Thanks again . Thanks Polarbear, sound advice, which I have now finally taken after scaring myself stupid!

Thanks Alisando, I know it's so scary but just remember it's probably something benign. This is particularly the case because you had the same result in the past without it getting significantly worse and also as if the GPs have any doubt about whether something is caused by cancer they usually do a 2-week cancer-pathway referral (even then most of the people referred do not turn out to have cancer). Keep distracting yourself and enjoying time with your partner and the new house.

Bruces, if you google 'mindfulness exercises, youtube' then some of them are really helpful- try either a breathing exercise or a bodyscan exercise. Alternatively do something physically active like a run, swim, bike ride or brisk walk, even doing star jumps can use up some of the anxiety/hyperactivity. If you cannot face physical activity write a list of 5 things that you are grateful for and ignore all the negative thoughts that question the positives. Even doing something like putting a laundry load in the machine, cooking a meal or looking online for a Christmas present for a family member can be distracting. The worst thing that you can do, which I'm very guilty of, is to sit and ruminate on one thing then the next. With regard to regrets about the impact of your illness or actions on family members/friends the thing to do is to make positive choices today- you could do something nice for your loved ones to make a difference and to distract you from these flitting thoughts.

Thanks Angst, Dragonfly and Polarbear, I was going to book an urgent appointment on the day on Thurs/Fri but I showed my Mum and she said it looked as though it was going down. I don't want to waste the GPs time, especially when I would have to face my contamination OCD in order to visit the practice (I haven't had an appt for 3 years). Our practice only really offers appointments for 3-4 weeks time unless you take an urgent one but now I'm unsure what to do as the red bump is still there. I've stopped googling because it was only scaring me but last night my brain was dwelling on morbid thoughts about death. Angst, that's so good that your skin lesion is benign. Dragonfly, I did find three things to concern me when checking my chest. I just want the little red spot/patch to disappear! how long did it take for yours to go? I'm concerned because it will be three weeks since I noticed this on Thursday! I think not having been seen by a GP yet isn't helping me but it's difficult to make the decision to take an urgent appointment unless I'm sure I need it. I'm still feeling scared some of the time so I think I should book a routine appointment unless it (the spot/lesion, not the feelings) gets any worse this week in which case I'll take an urgent appointment. xx

I'm not sure Efes, good question!

Hi Alisando, I'm really sorry you're having to cope with this. Remember though that common things are common and it does perhaps sound like it might be Nonalcoholic fatty liver disease. I would imagine for liver cancer your enzymes would be much higher. I know how awful it is to be scared about cancer though as I have been struggling with a worry this week but the likelihood is that it's something else and that the OCD is playing on the doubt. If you can then try to do anything distracting and enjoyable to take your mind off this as much as possible.

I'm not sure if it will help you Bruces but what I do is try to think 'The me I am today, is different from the me I was weeks/months/years ago (almost a separate person). I would not do the thing that I regret but yester-me (new word e.g. 2015-me) did it because they did not know what I know now! '. Try instead to focus on the person you want to be!