efes

I do this bimonthly, but I feel as if it's not enough. I worry that the way I do it is too dog whistle-like and not obvious enough.

Personally, mine involves wanting to constantly talk about a certain long-term plan or else it wouldn't come true, as if not talking about it would make the person forget.

I realized something: one of my biggest issues is fear of being excited over nothing, because that has been the case for me before. But at least I try to not give into that fear anymore.

I sounded so at peace when I said this, but that was only because I had just come back from a bad tantrum and didn't want to further anger myself.

Maybe it's for the best that I assume they will so that I don't have to consume myself with worry.

In my opinion, the worst-case scenario is them not coming true and fooling myself that life with them unfulfilled was fine. Settling basically.

Got here from searching a bunch of keywords. I could relate to the "am I not attracted enough?" thing. These days, I know how to ride out most OCD themes, but this is different because it's like a mental block.

I'm barely on here because these days, I'm more prone to generalized anxiety if anything, but sometimes, I have this theme I can't ride out, which is the fear I won't be able to enjoy things in the near future.

I got here by looking for the word "moles." I'm kinda shy to start a new thread, but let me just say that I think someone I otherwise find attractive may have an unappealing and large mole around the neck and this is my current OCD theme. (IDK what it is, this is just an online crush.)

If I try too hard, I'll fail.

I also feel the same about my generalized anxiety.

But it really did feel fake, like I was forcing it and I wanted to have a panic attack again because being so in control was tiring.

Well, I managed to do it for days, but it could be tiring and made me feel fake.

BTW, it's usually when the specific thought gets bad that it gets hard to relax.

1. Generalized anxiety 2. OCD where I'm ruminating about a thought 3. Displaced anxiety where I'm not exactly ruminating about a thought consciously but I feel like said thought is holding me back