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About ivybasil

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    Living with OCD

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  1. It sounds like you're really struggling with this at the moment @Cora! I'm sorry things are difficult at the moment. Like the others, I'm aware reassurance won't entirely help, but I'd like to offer a couple of thoughts. The groinal response you're experiencing - do you think you might only be noticing that because you're hyperaware? How many things does your body do every moment of the day but you don't notice because you don't attach the same significance? For example, sometimes my heart rate might be slightly quicker but because I'm not actively trying to monitor that but if I were, I might try and figure what was the cause and what it meant, what it means about me, what I should do about it. But could it just be that my body is just... being a body, and my OCD is the thing trying to give it too much significance? Secondly, this quote is from the charity 'Mind' on their page about OCD: You're in a situation that makes you anxious and that is adding to the problem. It's all about brain chemicals and natural body responses to those chemicals, nothing to do with anything else. OCD is the problem here, not you!
  2. Hi Kellyyy! Do you have a doctor/therapist at the moment? It sounds like the best thing to do would be to mention this to them It's definitely an avenue worth exploring if you have concerns! I have no particular experience, but I know there are a few people on the forums who do!
  3. Sending all the positive thoughts to you all! I think it's definitely hard to let go of anxiety for other people! You'll get through this, though! ❤️
  4. And things like making a cup of tea help you take some time to look after yourself too - always much needed when things are difficult! Hang in there! You'll get through this.
  5. It's much more difficult to put it into practise than to say it, I find! 😅 Once I've started obsessing about the thought it's so much harder to take a step back. You're right though - it's definitely more of the same! I've seen a few people and books recommend trying to acknowledge the thought like 'Oh, there's that thought again' and then you're not trying to just ignore it, but just not giving it any importance. I'm trying to think of it like training my puppy 😅 He's a nervous reactive dog, and I was told not to react to things that scare him and then he'll stop giving them as much attention too. If I can stay calm when my OCD is going 'LOOK AT THIS REACT TO THIS WHAT DOES THIS MEAN' then I'll be doing okay. 🐕
  6. Hope all goes well tomorrow! The Rescue Remedy sounds like a good idea for that - I sometimes find that feeling like I've done something about the anxiety helps to ease it off a little! I'm doing okay, thanks! I'm much more able to keep busy now. I think I still need to book a check-in with my GP but it's so hard to get hold of them and even harder to see one in person at the moment! But I'm coping much better now! Thank you!
  7. How are you feeling today, @BelAnna? As for herbal remedies, my pharamacist suggested that Rescue Remedy stuff with bach flower. I'd be curious to try it if I'm ever not on prescribed medication. I hope you find it helpful, @daja! On the subject of tea, I recently came across the OffBlak tea brand 😅 - they do one that's camomile and peach and it's excellent! I find that chamomile on its own doesn't taste of much either, hahah! Pukka tea is good too, imo! Love a good herbal tea! Especially if there can be a biscuit alongside...
  8. I think that's some great advice - those thoughts and feelings don't have to mean anything @Caramooleis right - be kind to yourself! Think about the things you did well here: you identified that you were ruminating, you're still doing the ERP, you asked for support when you needed it, you have been able to say that they are just thoughts, not proof. Consider all of this the healthy meals in Caramoole's biscuit analogy. They don't disappear because you ate the biscuit! Sometimes you might catch yourself ruminating, but the key thing is you could identify it for what it is! You can do this!
  9. Hi Nikki, it's great that you've been doing ERP! It's okay to be scared. What do you think you should do now? I'm not saying I won't offer advice too, but I think in this case the best advice will come from you! Imagine I had asked this question - what would you suggest to me? I think the important thing is to remember that you are doing the right thing with ERP and that thoughts and images have no power over you.
  10. Sorry you're going through this, BelAnna! I'm glad you feel able to share how you're feeling with us though - that's a big positive! Sometimes just being able to talk about it makes it a little easier to manage.
  11. Hope you find it helpful, WinnieWoo! And @To orangey for crows hope it works for you, too!
  12. I think you explained it very well - I understand, and it doesn't sound crazy! This must be really difficult but you're absolutely doing the right thing by stopping the extra cleaning. Like you said, you have a baby so I imagine there's plenty of other things you could do to keep yourself busy! I really admire your strength challenging these thoughts.
  13. I agree with PolarBear - medication is different for everyone. I'll just say that medication really helped me and I hope it helps you too! Both of Fluoxetine and Sertraline are common among people with OCD and some respond better to one than the other and it's okay to try both! Don't be disheartened if it takes a little while to find the right fit or dosage. Fluoxetine wasn't a good fit for me but Sertraline was. Others have found the opposite. Both are great treatment options.
  14. You're brave too! You're already challenging your OCD by talking about it! And stopping your washing rituals is AMAZING! Congratulations! I hope you can see how wonderful that is, despite the anxiety! The important thing to remember is that it is okay not to do those rituals and although the anxiety is horrible now, eventually it'll pass. Eventually the anxiety has nothing to do but fade and it'll become easier. I like to imagine it like going up a hill - the anxiety does go up in distressing situations, but eventually, I come over the top of the mountain and it does drop again. And hopefully the next hill is a smaller one 😅
  15. I agree - it's much easier said than done, isn't it? I think because the reaction doesn't always feel under our control, it makes it harder to think like that in the moment. Definitely - it took me a long time to realise the thoughts I was having were intrusive and nothing to do with who I am as a person. I don't have kids, but I worry about people dying a lot and the 'maybe I want that to happen' thought can be so traumatic! My compulsions are generally mental ones - I try and avoid thinking about the things that scare me and feel like I can't allow my brain to not have a distraction, or avoid things that might trigger these thoughts. I can handle this much better now, though! I still have bad days now and then, but I'm in a much better place now than I was before I was diagnosed. I can recognise the thoughts as 'just thoughts' and trust that the anxiety will pass, even if it's uncomfortable for a little while. I know I have support here if I need it, and from the Zoom groups and that makes the world of difference if I'm having a bad day! But it always passes, and over time, I'm definitely reacting less to the thoughts. Other people find that they can no longer be affected by OCD at all. You can get through this, and you're definitely not alone.
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