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constantworrier1989

Bulletin Board User
  • Content Count

    143
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About constantworrier1989

  • Birthday 28/05/1989

Previous Fields

  • OCD Status
    Sufferer

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    United States

Recent Profile Visitors

506 profile views
  1. Thank you! I’ll try that. I’m also trying breathing exercises. It’s just the fact that I’m anxious about it is making me feel like something is wrong. Guess it is OCD 😂😭
  2. I don’t know if this is even ocd related, but I know there are a lot of married people on here and I want to ask - we’re you scared and anxious before the wedding? It’s not even about my partner, it’s just... in general? any tips on calming myself down?
  3. I’ve been feeling a little better about things, but I noticed whenever I hear the word “forever” I get deeply uncomfortable and my heart starts to race. Is this just a trigger word? Does it mean anything that it scares me? What do I do? 😭
  4. That’s really encouraging to hear. I’m glad you’re doing well in your marriage! I know I’m doing every compulsion under the sun, it’s just so hard. Checking, ruminating, confessing. Everything! I’m being weak but trying not to be. the wedding is January 16th.
  5. I’m trying. It’s just kind of breaking my heart that I’m feeling this way
  6. Hi everyone, so I’ve been struggling with ROCD since my fiancé and I first moved in together a few years ago. I’ve been able to manage it fairly well, I mean kind of okay, and in the meantime we moved to a totally different state together and got engaged. Now, the wedding is in just over a month and oh my god my brain. I’ve been doing decently well but today is bad - it doesn’t help that it’s that time of the month. It always gets bad around this time. My main focus (right now) is that I’m scared. I know that I love him, despite my intrusive thoughts and doubts about that. But the fact that I’m scared of getting married/ marriage is freaking me the hell out. I’ve talked to him, my mom, and my sister about this and they all say it’s normal... but ugh. I just can’t relax! To top it off two of my bridesmaids are being horrible. Does the fact that I’m scared and anxious mean I don’t want this? Does anyone else feel this anxious before they get married??? We paid off the photographer today, which I thought would bring me relief but now I just feel more anxious. I don’t even know what I’m rambling about anymore to be honest. I’m just all over the place and I hate that I’m not just blissfully happy in this, the time of my engagement. Instead my heart is racing and just ugh! I don’t even know what I want from posting this. Maybe I just wanted to rant. If anyone has tips or experience with this, please share.
  7. Hey me90! I actually think I have the same username that I did on SIAD lol. I can’t offer any great advice but I wanted to let you know that I care about you and do think of you from time to time. Im so sorry to hear that you’re having such a hard time with withdrawals and OCD. You’ve helped me out quite a few times in the past and it was (and still is) deeply appreciated! I hope that’s not too weird coming from someone you’ve only chatted with a few times on the internet ? Also, hi lasthope! I recognize your name from SIAD! ?
  8. And my friends keep saying, “if you know you know”, and that doesn’t help at all. They also don’t overthink everything like I do!
  9. Thank you lostinme. I’m trying so hard to just let the thoughts pass but it’s like every second I’m thinking about it on some level. The word fiancé makes me uncomfortable so that makes me worry. I know this is all irrational on one hand, because I want to spend my life with him... but on the other hand this could possibly be a huge mistake. That small doubt is turning into a big doubt because I keep thinking about it and I just want it to stop.
  10. I’ve really been struggling since my fiancé and I got engaged. I love him and want to spend my life with him, but I keep feeling like something isn’t right. I don’t know what it is... it’s just kind of a feeling. Like I have doubts about us lasting “forever” (that word specifically worries me, and the phrase “spend our lives together”) and it worries me that I don’t want to wait 2 years to get married. My sister said “well y’all will be together regardless” and the thought scared me? I don’t know what to do... I know I shouldn’t be asking for reassurance but ugh. Also he’s the first person I’ve ever wanted to have children with, and I wonder if that’s the only reason I love him? Because I want babies?! Do I just accept the thoughts and move on? ???? Feel free to slap some sense into me, also.
  11. Once my boyfriend and I moved in together I suddenly started doubting whether I love him or not even though literally a week before I was a million percent sure that I did. I’ve been trying to deal with that for about a year now, obviously it’s not going amazingly. The main thing I’m having a problem with is, when I get annoyed with him about little things like him being a chatterbox, etc, I feel so guilty and like it means something. I know logically that it doesn’t (right?!), but I just can’t stop worrying about it. This usually happens right around/ during my period which probably doesn’t help either. Basically, I don’t know how to stop feeling guilty about being annoyed and worrying that me being annoyed with him means something. I try not to think about it but I get sad and he can usually tell, and I end up confessing to him. I know I need to stop doing that - but what else can I do?
  12. What if I’m just writing them out? I’ve been wanting to journal lately, I feel like it’ll help, but I don’t know how to do it without mentioning my OCD.
  13. Would journaling (and not showing anyone) about the thoughts specifically be a compulsion?
  14. Hey everyone! I was wondering - sometimes, when my relationship centered OCD isn't terrible, I get those "in love" feelings, or even just any happy feeling toward my partner. I tend to try to hold on to them, almost like I want to use that moment or that feeling to prove to myself that I do love him. Is that a compulsion?
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