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OldCrazyDame

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  • OCD Status
    Sufferer

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    Female
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    Essex

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  1. I hope I'm not too late to reply but I started CBT/ERP therapy in March after suffering from the OCD bully for 53 years. My score on the OCD chart when I started was 136 and now it is 27. I am actually beginning to know what a normal life is like. I know i have to keep on working at it but know how to manage it now. it is such a relief. So don't anyone give up. It can be done. If I can do it you centainly can!
  2. I have ahd OCD what seems like forever and it has never hindered my work. In fact, they know nothing about it. Us OCDers learn to live with it and and hide it very well. I am just coming to the end of my CBT/ERP therapy and can honestly say it is the best thing I have ever done for coping with OCD. Everything is so much easier now. It will probably never go away but I have learnt how to manage it. I got my therapy through the charity MIND. They give you a telephone assessment and then if necessary make an appointment for you to begin therapy. I am having online video sessions and they are working reallly well. They tell you that they have to inform your GP but it is entirely up to you if you tell workk or not. I had to wait about 12 weeks for the appointment but it was well worth it. I actually feel like I am getting a 'normal' life.
  3. I got my CBT/ERP therapy through the charity MIND (Inclusion). I waited for three months which is a lot better than eight. Contact your local branch and they phone you and give you a telephone assessment. In the meantime, the above advice is good. There are also helpful videos on You Tube which can also help.
  4. What you are describing is like one of my OCD symtoms. I am frighted to voice any ideas I have in case someone comes to harm from it. Like asking people to pick me up to go somewhere. I would never forgive myself if anything happened to them because of it. It's all to do with that OCD doubt and you have to be strong and try to ignore it and don't let the doubt get to you. Just say and do what you feel.
  5. This is definitely OCD. I'll probably get told off for saying this but tell you mum what happened. She can then decide what to do about the situation. I'm sure she won't be phased by it. You know you are not purposefully putting her in danger. The reason you posted this is because you are trying to save her from infection. It's just OCD rearing its ugly head again. Be strong and keep fighting it!
  6. I agree with what you say dksea but would like to add my own experience. It is not just the fact of it not feeling right for me, it is also if I have a bad thought while I'm doing it - and of course the more you try not to think of something, the more it pops into your head, so compulsions can be a lengthy process. I used to find it so difficult when my compulsions were challenged because of all the anxiety and stress it caused. It made every day hard to bare. It was of no help at all until I started to get professional help and started ERP and was given the tools to be able to cope and understand why it was necessary to be challenged and not be helped with compulsions. What I am trying to say Hopefull1 is make sure your son gets the appropriate professional help that he needs and that he understands that you are trying to help him. As dksea says, encourage him gradually to get over his fears. Offer to help him, be with him eg turning off the switch might be a good starting point. Unfortunately, the road to recovery can be long and slow but with your obvious love and support, I'm sure you'll get there.
  7. If it said 'Even though you're disabled and I have to look after you, I still love you', how many people would find that acceptable?
  8. Hi Tomi Part of my OCD is exactly what you are suffering. I had it with my own children and it eased a little as they got older. Now I have grandchildren it has reared its full blown ugly head again I have had OCD for as long as I can remember too (and that is quite a time!!) and there was no help around when I was younger. However, now there is. Take Polar Bear's advise and look at CBT and especially, what worked for me, ERP. It helped me immensely. Unfortunately I had a really bad trigger and all the OCD came flooding back. I am now waiting for an appointment for more ERP therapy so that I can get my life back on track again. Believe me, you can control it with professional help, I contacted my local MIND who were really quick in getting back to me. A telephoned interview followed and now I am just waiting to for treatment to start again. ERP IS hard work but well worth it. Please get some help quickly. I know nothing I can say is going to make you stop. I really feel for you. I can just let you know that when I stopped doing the compulsions before, nothing happened to my loved ones and if it did, I knew it wasn't my fault. There is light at the end of the tunnel. It would help if you can find someone to talk to. I kept mine a secret from my husband for years but coping has been so much easier since I told him and now my sister knows too. It is good to confide in someone, especially when you are having a really bad time of it. Keep posting on here too. There are loads of us who can try to help but professional help is the key. If I were you, i'd look into today. What always helps me is to remember what I read a while ago. YOU made all the rules for your compulsions. So because they are your rules, you can break them!
  9. Hello So sorry to hear about your situation. A really hard one to answer. When I married my husband he didn't know about my OCD although he said he always knew something was wrong. I kept it a secret for years which is something I regret now. It is so much easier now, knowing that he understands and can help. I remember vividly how much more anxiety I suffered hiding it. I also went for counseling which has helped immensely and am waiting to go back this year. You don't mention if you are getting professional help. If not, I would strongly advise it. I feel sure it would certainly help you with your relationship issues and feelings of guilt and worthlessness. OCD is much more understood and talked about now than it ever was and I am sure there is someone out there who would understand what you have, and are, going through. I hope this helps a bit. You may not have a partner at the moment but remember, you are NOT alone in your suffering.
  10. It sounds like you need some professional help - and quickly. Try phoning MIND or the NHS help line 111 (option 2). Good luck and don't give up!!
  11. With regard to compulsions: You made all the rules so you can break them!
  12. Thanks Jumbo, Hope you get the help you need quickly too. It makes me so cross, If you had a bad back you wouldn't have to wait so long to get help or be told to get treated online! Good luck
  13. It definitely sounds like OCD. Non OCD sufferers would have kissed and hugged their brother, felt a rush of sibling love,embraced it and forgotten about it. OCD won't allow you to do that, It takes everything out of context and builds on it. We all have feelings of love for siblings, our children, partners etc and we should not feel guilty about them. They are natural so don't beat yourself up about it. What happened was NOT bad, just normal.
  14. Hi Jumbo I have just read your post. Have you tried the charity MIND. They have loads of branches. I phoned them on Wednesday and have set the ball in motion. They asked when I would be available for a telephone consultation which leads to going on the list for therapy. When i did this before, I had to wait about eight weeks before I was able to be seen but I did get the appropriate therapy from a proper therapist. If you google MIND it tells you on the website where you closest one would be. Hope your OCD has calmed down and good luck with everything.
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