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Lost in Thought

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Everything posted by Lost in Thought

  1. Hi @malina Thanks for your reply! I hope it gets better, because today was awful and topped off by the team leader and the other long term member of staff both going home separately so we were left to fend for ourselves for most the afternoon. Just think thats unprofessional and not a good first impression.
  2. I am struggling a bit at the moment. Firstly wife keeps getting upset and unhappy because she's fed up with the virus and I feel she takes it out on me. Last week I started a new job, and everything was fine until Friday when I started feeling anxious. I didn't feel the training we got last week was thorough and the trainers went off topic a lot. Today was my first proper day, and I felt anxious this morning. I felt like I didn't get the support and help needed & I emailed my agency to tell them I am unhappy. It's not the work, its not rocket science, but just felt like can't cope, and hoping it will improve after a few days. I can cope, but it is a struggle to cope and I feel really low right now.
  3. I don’t know why but I feel really restless and unable to sit still!? Last night I couldn’t sleep because my head was swirling away and so I got up and did some tidying up. Hate this feeling in my body of being on edge, like I can’t sit down and relax. I have been doing a to do list and getting things ticked off it but it still doesn’t seem to be enough. Had thoughts of maybe better dead but I haven’t made any plans or thought any further than that. I don’t know what to do about it.
  4. Hello, I feel bad and like Im being strange! You see I’ve have been losing my temper and shouting quite a lot recently and a lot of it is to do with my OCD. I don’t mind my kids using my CD player but they keep moving it so it’s no longer lined up straight. I know it’s silly but I want/ need it just so or it annoys me and makes me really irritated. So I swear and shout. I know it is crazy but I just don’t like other people touching it especially children with sticky and dirty fingers. I don’t know I’m so possessive of this CD player except for I have owned it for many years so maybe it is a sentimental thing. I don’t like being so precious and also so materialistic about inanimate objects but don’t feel I have control over this urge to keep it nice and straight. Anyone offer any advice?
  5. Thanks @Handy So don’t use caffeine at all? I have been having 2-3 coffees a day during lockdown
  6. Hi @cashewnutsandraisins I’ve found not drinking fizzy drinks and Tea has helped me enormously. Went for my first run in months yesterday but I didn’t measure how far or fast I went as was just happy getting around in one piece. Find it does give me too much time to think and I start going over ruminations when I run.
  7. Fantastic stuff Lucy Well done, not easy but very brave if you! You can and will do it again
  8. Hi @unsureandunstable Im not an expert but in my strictly amateur opinion it does sound like it could well be intrusive thoughts you are experiencing, however I would get expert advice and see if you can get a diagnosis. avoiding situations like with children will only give the thoughts power as your head will think maybe there is something in the thoughts as your going to such lengths to avoid contact. Remember they are just thoughts not facts and just because you think something doesn’t mean you will act on it.
  9. Thank you for your response @UpsAndDowns I can't wait until its over and think I will book a hotel room just for me and sleep for a whole week.
  10. Hello, I hope this doesn’t sound like, come across as showing off but things have improved for me in some ways and I feel less stuck about my relationship with my wife after a long chat where I got everything off my chest and felt physically lighter afterwards. I had built it up to be this big thing as with most things it was easier then I expected. I have made a to do list and prioritised the tasks and then made a little schedule with two or three tasks a day over a week so I no longer put pressure on myself to finish all the tasks in one day like I used to do. a it’s been three months but it feels like 3 years since I started being the main carer for my kids while my wife works from home and it feels tougher then ever. My youngest can be impossible to control, going around the house non stop either making mess or decorating the walls, tables and anything else with crayon and ir doesn’t stop unless my youngest is either eating or sleeping. It’s so draining and I just feel like I can’t cope. I find myself losing my temper, getting irate and shouting at them both more & more, which I’m not proud of. It’s just I feel at the end of my tether and it’s badly affecting my mental health. My other half is very worried (maybe OTT) about the virus and the possibility of any of us catching it so she won’t let the eldest go back to school until it’s safe so probably not until September and doesn’t want to travel to my parents home which is not far away as she doesn’t think social distancing will be adhered to. Don’t know what to do, feel like walking out the door, but where can I go and it would be unfair leaving my partner to cope with the kids by herself. But despite the fact it is unfairness I’m tempted to pack my bags.
  11. Listening to your favourite songs can help distract you and access feelings if you listen to emotional music
  12. Thanks @AmandaG for your reply Being more aware of amount of sugar I eat this week and trying not to eat white bread. Have found it helped my mood.
  13. The earth is not flat? Next you will be telling me they didn't stage the Moon landings ?
  14. Does anyone find what they eat or drink effects their mood? I used to drinks tons of diet fizzy drinks but the caffeine would bring on my anxiety and since I stopped drinking it at all my mind has been so much less anxious. When I ate a sweet yesterday and not long after had a bad headache, felt grump and agitated as well. I don’t know if this was related or just coincidental. Anyone have similar experiences?
  15. Hi @Roroyouboat sorry to hear you get so upset and you feel overwhelmed. It sounds really hard. I don’t like mess either and feel uneasy/ restless until I tidy it up. It’s difficult as a parent with children as they make mess non stop and it constantly feels like I am tidying up after them. It is all about control for me and I am a bit of a control freak. I need objects to be just right, lined up straight and a certain way. Do you find this? It’s good you are or are looking to get help. That’s very important. I have found talking to counsellors helped me but getting CBT therapy really helps.
  16. I second that @Doubt_It !!! Had a good talk to my wife after she asked me if we are planning to go abroad and told her everything I’ve been thinking on a possible move - positives and negatives to moving for me. I was calm and it was easier then I’d built it up to be. We didn’t decide anything but I heard how she’s also worried about moving home as hasn’t lived their for over a decade and when she did she was out of uni. No children and no responsibilities. So if we went there now or even if my wife did without me it would be very different for her which I hadn’t thought about before.
  17. Hi @Kelly2004 How long have you been working on a Helpdesk? Do you see it as a long term career or are you doing it along side studying at uni? I worked on a Helpdesk and you can be on the ball but sometimes no matter what you do customers will still be unhappy & ask to speak to your team leader. It has happened to me more times then I care to remember! It is not always our fault they might have just had an argument with a colleague and be taking it out on you or have just got up on the wrong side of bed! I bet it must be difficult with changes due to the virus and it isn’t an easy job anyway as you can be quiet some days and other days get inundated! All you can do is try your best because nobody is perfect we all make mistakes
  18. Thanks dksea, When I was doing CBT I did mini exposure exercises with my clothes - wearing my “best clothes” and sitting with the anxiety this caused rather than checking them to make sure nothing was “wrong with them” I have rationalised how clothes aren’t perfect when you get them, they are tried on by other people, moved around the shop, transported to the shop etc so they are bound to get some damage before I get them ( obvious I know)
  19. Hi I don't know if this is OCD and if anyone else has experienced or heard of anything like this? This may sound strange but here goes. I have always needed things to be symmetrical, exact and perfect. My parents say I always ate things in a certain order when I was a child, and I remember wanting shoes to be lined up just so. In my teens was when it really kicked in, I wouldn't/ couldn't wear certain clothes I deemed nice in order to keep them 'perfect' and exactly as they were when I got them like it was my job. This has improved thanks to CBT, and having children helped me realise there are far more important things in life then getting a stain on my favourite T shirt. Having said that I still worry about certain items in my wardrobe if I wear and feel tense until I get home and then I can take them off.
  20. Yep I agree I do find myself feeling better when I take breaks from the news and don’t keep up what is going on in the world. I feel like newspapers and TV news deliberately focus on the negatives rather than positives to keep us scared/ worried so we stay in line and so we don’t “rock the boat” let’s say. Or maybe I’m just becoming a conspiracy theorist.
  21. Well kind of, if me and my family fly on holiday I feel like if I don’t worry before the flight something there will be a fault with the plane and we will crash
  22. Likewise I remember sharing some terrible jokes when I was a child/ teenager about Ethiopians to fit in with other kids. I told the English man, Irish man, Scots man etc jokes that would play on stereotypes. I played at a cricket club where when we played a Muslim team some people would joke they all will be arriving driving taxis and about making meat sandwiches for the cricket tea. I spoke to a person afterwards calling them out but wish I had called it out at the time and not been so timid. A lot of the clubs I played for were so overwhelming white which is quite remarkable in a multicultural city and we weren’t overtly racist but maybe it was an unconscious thing. Im glad and proud to now play for a club with people from lots of different ethnic backgrounds and if we weren’t we would probably have folded as a club. I like to think of myself as anti racist and I am disgusted by racism & xenophobia but I know I need to learn more and be more vocal to call things out
  23. You are a star! I will try to accentuate the positives
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