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DHJGOCD

OCD and Toileting -Anyone Else??

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My primary ritual is toileting. Completing routines around urinating and counting, time, orders - especially before bed. On good days il be in bed after 2 hours of completing this, but if interrupted by anything, LITERALLY ANYTHING, I have to start again and before I've had the time to blink day-light has returned. I struggle so much to find support around this because I guess it's not the 'norm' so anyone I've ever shared it with cannot understand the rational. My routine has been the same since I was an infant, I think originally it made me feel safer going to bed as night time, as I felt terror around night time. I've always had to hide it, I've been ridiculed by those who know, where their firm attempt for me to 'just go to bed' has left me feeling trapped and alone, with these thoughts and it couldn't have pushed me further from achieving just that. I don't know what I'm expecting from posting this, I feel discouraged that another person may have the same experience, but I guess I hope to share my story with others who understand - if not specifically, but the general torture that comes with OCD thinking. Thanks for reading xoxox

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9 hours ago, DHJGOCD said:

My primary ritual is toileting. Completing routines around urinating and counting, time, orders - especially before bed. On good days il be in bed after 2 hours of completing this

Hi and welcome to the forums :)

Like you my OCD used to be primarily around toileting, although slightly differently, for me it was germs. But each time I used the toilet it would also take me 2+ hours of rituals.  Yes at one time if I was interrupted or something in the ritual did not feel right I would have to start all over again.

9 hours ago, DHJGOCD said:

I've been ridiculed by those who know, where their firm attempt for me to 'just go to bed' has left me feeling trapped and alone, with these thoughts and it couldn't have pushed me further from achieving just that

It is hard for loved ones to understand OCD sometimes, and sadly even some therapists (the **** ones) have said to people 'just stop doing that' or 'just stop thinking that', which of course if only it was that easy right!

The good news is that with good help and good support we can all improve, and if we push, we can recover too (whatever recovery means to people).

I think you mentioned a recovery coordinator on another thread. I am not actually sure what that term/role is?  Do you have a therapist for CBT too?  Although I know a lot of people have had therapy suspended in the short term.

Anyway, the good news is we are here for you if you need to talk, Ashley :) 

 

 

 

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10 hours ago, Ashley said:

Hi and welcome to the forums :)

Like you my OCD used to be primarily around toileting, although slightly differently, for me it was germs. But each time I used the toilet it would also take me 2+ hours of rituals.  Yes at one time if I was interrupted or something in the ritual did not feel right I would have to start all over again.

It is hard for loved ones to understand OCD sometimes, and sadly even some therapists (the **** ones) have said to people 'just stop doing that' or 'just stop thinking that', which of course if only it was that easy right!

The good news is that with good help and good support we can all improve, and if we push, we can recover too (whatever recovery means to people).

I think you mentioned a recovery coordinator on another thread. I am not actually sure what that term/role is?  Do you have a therapist for CBT too?  Although I know a lot of people have had therapy suspended in the short term.

Anyway, the good news is we are here for you if you need to talk, Ashley :) 

 

 

 

I just began replying and lost it -so I'm not certain if you're going to receive 2 replies now *sigh. Thank you for your message, its uplifting to hear theres hope. My 'Recovery Coordinator' is a Community Psychiatric Nurse within the Community Mental Health Team - she meets with me monthly and sign posts me to community support and self-help. I had a short stint of CBT but my needs were regarded as 'too complex' (whatever that means) do I have recently started 'Cognitive Analytical Therapy'. I am so grateful for therapy but it's doesnt specifically help me manage OCD, so despite me addressing my thought patterns, the loudness of OCD thoughts is ever present. Il keep trying, I've just never been given a direction for how to manage it. I hope you are well and safe at this time,

Dani 

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Hey,

Thanks for posting this, I can totally relate. I have similar rituals around the toilette, to the point that I once slept on the landing for fear of having to complete my ritual and the stress that came with going to bed. I have additionally spent numerous nights up till all hours unable to get into bed. If someone talks to me, says good night, disrupts the routine, I have to start all over. 

I am sorry that I can't offer much advice as it is a battle I am continuously facing, but I am glad you posted this as it is nice knowing this problem must be an OCD manifestation and not simply myself being weird as someone else is experiencing the same. 

Stay safe and I wish you all the best! 

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Your needs are no more complex than anyone else's. You need CBT and only CBT. Likely a fairly long course of it.

Bottom line is that you need the cognitive side to learn why your compulsions are useless and you need to change your behavior. That last part means stopping your compulsions, one at a time, and over time, under the watchful eye of a qualified therapist.

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Hi Dani, polarbear works tirelessly to help others and offers great advice on these forums, but I personally think he is wrong in this case. OCD suffers can fall into the trap of thinking that their particular manifestation of ocd is more unusual/difficult than other peoples' which can prevent them with engaging with CBT, however 'complex' can also mean you  have other mental health problems other than just OCD on its own, and therefore these other problems may need to be tackled first before you can meaningfully engage with CBT. Have you been given a treatment plan?

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29 minutes ago, Wren said:

however 'complex' can also mean you  have other mental health problems other than just OCD on its own, and therefore these other problems may need to be tackled first before you can meaningfully engage with CBT.

Complex can mean there are other problems alongside OCD, but it's not always necessary to treat them first, or indeed to treat everything sequentially. The principles of CBT are relevant to most mental health conditions, even if the fine tuning varies a little. 

I suggest attempting to make a list of which problems bother you most and ensure your Recovery Plan addresses the most troublesome/time-consuming/distressing symptoms first. By the sound of it that's your OCD. Two hours plus of bedtime rituals is mentally and physically exhausting. Do you think the CAT you've received has given you helpful insights into your behaviour to the extent you can reduce the rituals, or at least not engage with the thought you need to start over if interupted in any way? If not then perhaps it would be more useful to try CBT again. 

I think a therapist familiar with OCD would find your situation rather standard stuff, not at all complex from how you described it here. I'm aware you may only have shared  part of whatever troubles you so it could be complicated by other conditions, but often people get told they're 'complex' when what is really happening is the therapist is a bit out of their depth and the client is straightforward. :)

How are you getting on with the self help? What is the community support on offer and does that help? 

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