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Emsie

OCD-UK Member
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Everything posted by Emsie

  1. I completely agree with GBG, it's pretty much directly proportional for me.
  2. So glad you agree, thank you for all that you said, Roy. And I’ve done the beneficially resting this evening too. I’m going to build on my momentum.
  3. We really need to remember this as I've had another fulfilling day with activities and me too, rarely troubled. I feel like the longer I can take this approach, the more weaning off OCD thoughts and behaviours that I can do. A new normal. X
  4. Hi Dave, a huge well done! It’s brilliant what you’ve done. Keep going as PB says. X
  5. Hi everyone, I think my tip would be to limit the opportunities for OCD to come in to play. Based on my recent experiences, I have been very engrossed in various things over the last few days. Today for example, I have been gardening and tidying up the garden in general. I’ve been fully in the moment during these activities and various issues that I have at the moment were not in play at all. It knocks them away from my focus and it does diminish them afterwards. Mornings are always my danger point, and I know others here have said the same, so my other tip would be to not put yourself in a position for OCD thoughts and then compulsions on existing ‘issues’ to rear. For me, this would involve getting on with my day and not being on my own and left to my own devices. I know these are basic, but I have really noticed how much better I am when I’m fully occupied. Take care everyone. X
  6. Thank you PolarBear! No, me neither. At the moment if I find an ‘issue’ I just try to not engage/not do compulsions as my CBT techniques. When I fail it’s a catastrophic fail. I do have a thing about lumps and they are a big obsession, but it is not the only thing, it could be anything about my health...skin cancer, mouth cancer, bowel cancer, my heart, diabetes, my teeth, MS etc etc to name a few that I have feared.
  7. Thank you so much, PolarBear! That makes perfect sense, but I do find it pretty scary! I find ‘lumps’ from time to time so it would be sporadic and unplanned ERP...do you think that’s ok/enough? I couldn’t employ this technique with my daughter (she’s 3), I find that too risky. At the moment, I would tell my rational husband and let him make a decision. I don’t know what the way forward with her would be as I cannot take risks with her and ‘experiment’ therapy with her. Also, and I know this is a predictable avenue, but one day by employing this ERP on myself, I could miss a genuine problem/health issue, so how do I deal with that? Or do you think a genuine health issue/lump etc would be obvious and therefore I would naturally take sensible action by seeing the doctor? A big thank you!
  8. I completely understand the need to do extreme exercises and I can see how it can be applied to many themes. However, I don’t understand how I can apply it to one of my themes, which is health, either my own or others. If I can give an example, I find a ‘lump’ in my neck, next comes rush of anxiety, I panic it’s abnormal, I keep checking it and comparing it with the opposite side of my body, I ruminate, I google and end up seeing a doctor to get it checked to then find out it’s perfectly normal. That’s a very brief description of my intrusive thoughts and feelings and compulsions. Lumps are a big thing for me and I fear seeing and feeling them on myself, daughter, husband and even my cats. I can work on stopping the compulsions, that I understand, but what would my anti OCD exposure exercises be? Thank you for any help that you can give me on this.
  9. You are so very welcome ?. I really hope you can apply PolarBear’s great advice in his video. Keep going, you can do this. X
  10. You're so welcome. Yes, I do think our brains look to find one that sticks. But, with awareness of that I think it reveals how false it all is. I'm so glad you haven't had any intense anxiety pangs, but if you do, remember it's a false alarm. Don't assume one will latch, but if the anxiety pang comes, push through it and say to yourself that you're not going to deal with that right now and delay any compulsions. Choose a time to delay for and when that time comes, try to delay again and so on. The anxiety will fade. Yes, it's hard to stop the ruminating, but you can. I'll post a link in a min to a video PolarBear did on stopping ruminating. Rest well tonight.
  11. Hi there, yes it’s totally normal for that to happen. OCD loves a home. Your brain is scanning for things to latch on to. This happens to me a lot. I feel that my brain actively looks for things. I’m really pleased for you that these old obsessions haven’t latched on yet, keep going. Don’t engage and refocus away when they pop up. Remember any compulsions surrounding them will only reinforce them and add fuel to the fire. Look after yourself too, eating and sleeping well will give you resilience. Take care.
  12. Perfectly put! Great analogy. Thank you PolarBear. X
  13. I’ll look at how I can approach this and give it a go. Thank you.
  14. Bless you Roy for finding your previous post to share with me. Thank you, again so helpful. I have tried to work out my core belief on this one and I’ve found it confusing as it appears I have more than one surrounding health, actually quite a few core beliefs if that’s possible?? I can’t get down to one. I worked out my other core beliefs surrounding my other themes and they were clear cut, but the health one seems complex in terms of core beliefs so maybe that’s why it’s harder to crack?? Incidentally I have pretty much cracked a lot of my other obsessions/themes where it was straightforward working out my core belief. Thank you so much for your support and great advice.
  15. Thank you so much Roy, that’s all brilliant and so helpful.
  16. Thank you for your help here, Roy. My therapist only went as far as just noticing the thoughts and not engaging with them to break the cycle. That was the main work, plus reducing and stopping compulsions. I think the premise was break the cycle enough times for each obsession and the thoughts in general will fade and loose their power. But I can have so many different obsessions. I never did any structured ERP. And that’s what I don’t understand....how do I do that with health fears? symptom/observation = serious illness/cancer; googling for reassurance and then making it x1000 worse with new ‘knowledge’; reassurance seeking from husband and then sometimes a trip to the GP - that’s a common pattern for me. Just to say Roy, I don’t fear those issues you’ve described, the theme I cannot crack is Health (mine and sometimes my daughters).
  17. I’m finding this discussion very interesting. I can see how you can face your fear/thoughts for example if you fear stabbing someone with a knife. In this situation you’d use the knives for cooking let’s say and expose yourself to being around others. You’d sit with the anxiety and carry on. But how do you face your thoughts when your fear a certain symptom is cancer or MS etc or you fear a health issue with a loved one? It’s not something I can agree with. For example...’yes, that lymph node I can feel is cancer’. (A doctor said it was normal and nothing to worry about, but I had to see the doctor for reassurance). And I can list many situations like this where I have sought reassurance. When I was in CBT, my therapist advised me to notice the thoughts and not engage to break the cycle. Is that ok?
  18. You’re so welcome leif I’m so pleased you were able to continue not doing any more compulsions. Well done! So glad you’re feeling better about it. X
  19. Me too, I can so easily get caught in it too. When I don’t it is when I haven’t engaged initially. I find it harder at certain times of the month and if I’m tired/run down. One thought can affect me so badly and I go straight in to panic mode, but on another day I can be so much more resilient to it. That’s one reason why looking after ourselves too is so important. That’s so good you were able to stop, well done. I really hope you’re feeling less sad and stuck now. Keep going and I hope you’re ok. X
  20. Hi leif, Your first reaction is the one to go with. That hitting you in the gut feeling later is the intrusive feeling that there was something wrong. You've got a good insight in to what's going on and I know it's so hard to do, but stopping that one smaller compulsion right away is really important to break free from. Doing that one compulsion just keeps you stuck. It's the easiest thing to do for short term relief, but it's important to look at the bigger picture. Then there's that intrusive feeling that's setting off a false alarm and it's responding to that too that keeps you stuck and the thought of doing those extra compulsions feels like you can justify doing just that one smaller one. But it's all a vicious, horrible cycle and it has to be nipped at the intrusive thought/feeling by not engaging and just noticing. I know what you mean when you say that you can't stop all of those extra complusions that ruin our days, but in reality we can stop them. We might think we can't, but we can. Sometimes it's easier and sometimes it's harder to stop them, but as you know it's those that keep us stuck. And do they really make you/we feel better? Take care and keep fighting x
  21. That's great advice for us all. When I read advice like this it really does inspire me and gives me back hope. I hope it helps you too Madchoc. Please don't feel ashamed or guilty, you have no reason to. The solution is hard, but simple. I've been round and round today and the above advice is spot on and I will dust myself off and start again. You can retrain your thinking about things that are wet. I believe you can. Take care. X
  22. You're so welcome, Dave. It is hard, but as Avo has just said to me we have to trust the process and stick with it. Yes, I really believe with a few victories you can really start moving forward. Bless you, thank you. And I am very grateful for you reaching out to me today. Try and do something nice for yourself this evening. X
  23. Hi Avo, I'm glad you're ok, and I hope there are less challenges for you soon. Thank you, I've only read part of break free, so I should start it again and give it another go. I think the last thing you said is key about trusting the process and sticking with it. It's the sticking with it that fluctuates for me and where I fall down. Thank you. X
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