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I contain myself in my house as much as I can but I have to go out with the family, for their sake.  When I do it’s so difficult.  It’s so scary for me and I always, always, see something I wish I hadn’t.  It triggers a whole load of negativity.  Life is becoming more and more difficult. 

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Agorophobia is difficult, it's scary.....but  it's achievable.to ovrrcome it. Been there, haven't been for a long time.

What plans have you in place to challenge this?  You do need to to make a decision to challenge.......but that can be in bite-sized chunks.

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6 hours ago, Caramoole said:

Agorophobia is difficult, it's scary.....but  it's achievable.to ovrrcome it. Been there, haven't been for a long time.

What plans have you in place to challenge this?  You do need to to make a decision to challenge.......but that can be in bite-sized chunks.

No ok s in place as such.  I try to stay in but with family I have to get out sometimes.  It’s triggera my contamination ocd so badly.  Went out on Saturday and it’s affecting me still this morning because I feel I didn’t clean something from that day and I just touched it.

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15 hours ago, lonely mum said:

I try to stay in

As Caramoole said, getting over an anxiety is difficult and leaving a place where you feel safe is particular hard for an anxiety sufferer, but in the long run trying to stay in all the time is only going to make things harder.  Compulsions like avoidance feed the OCD and make it stronger.  The best way forward is to start taking steps to actively get out, even if its only for a few minutes at a time at first.  It may seem cruel but the fact that your family life forces you to go out sometimes is a good thing, challenging anxieties is the way to overcome them.  I think you would benefit from a structured plan of exposures for this, and if possible working with a therapist or doctor would be a good step.

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Hi lonely mum :)

I agree with caramoole and dksea comments :goodpost:.

Are you seeing a therapist? If you are not seeing a therapist, you should give that step and go to see one. You don't deserve to have a difficult life. You deserve to have a happy life. And a therapist can help you to reach the life you really want.

big HU:hug:

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Dksea makes some good points.  Staying in seems a safe option but it's only in that moment you feel safe.  In the long run your life becomes more and more restricted, the problem gets worse and life is very difficult.

It isn't easy dealing with this, it provokes anxiety but it is do-able.  You have to come to the decision that you're going to change this.  You have to make a plan of action and how yoy're going to tackle this.  You WILL be challenged, you will face anxiety.  Make the decision that you will accept this, that you are prepared to work through anxiety in order to get your life back.  I'll bet that even staying safe in your house you still feel anxious anyway.

You are in charge of your plan and at what pace you proceed, it can be in tiny baby steps but even so, you will have to step just outside your comfort zone.  Sit down today and think of one thing you're going to tackle to start the journey to dealing with this.  It might be that you'll walk 500 metres to the local shop to buy a bar of chocolate.  It might be that you just walk 20 metres to the bus stop and stand there for one minute.

Watch the conversation in your head.  It will be saying "I can't do this, what if I panic, what if there's something nasty on my shoes, I can't do it, I've got to get home" Substitute your own conversation but sure as eggs are eggs, you will be having that conversation.  Write down the things you typically say to yourself, you'll see that you are frightening yourself to death.  Expect those negative phrases, be ready for them, don't be caught out......and then change them with determination to....."I can do this, I am going to do this....you're not taking anymore of my life, I'm going to beat this".  When the fear strikes, don't run for home straight away, stay until that initial strike of fear subsides.

See if you can make a start with a few things you regularly avoid, by all means start gently.....but start :)

 

 

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Thank you for all your comments.  I’ve just read them and will be re-reading them tomorrow .  Thank you 

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On 11/03/2019 at 08:25, lonely mum said:

I try to stay in but with family I have to get out sometimes.  It’s triggera my contamination ocd so badly.  Went out on Saturday and it’s affecting me still this morning because I feel I didn’t clean something from that day and I just touched it.

I can relate to this, and if I am honest if I think back a few years this was me too Lonely Mum, in fact if I think back two decades I would have to shower if I just nipped across the road to the local shop.  At one point I would have to have indoor and outdoor clothes and the two couldn't mix.

But, I am in a different place now, and maybe one day you can be too Lonely mum. I now go out and come back in and sit on my sofa with clothes I have worn outside, I go out and don't shower when I return. My life is different to how it used to be, and to some extent I had even forgot how my life used to be, it's posts like yours that remind me.    I am not saying that to say 'look at me', I am saying this in the hope that you might get some belief that your life can change for the better too.

The others have made good points, but I did want to ask, have you been able to access any kind of help or support for your OCD yet? I know from my support group that OCD treatment in Leicester is not always the best it should be. So there may be other options if you have already had treatment.

Stay strong, you've got this!

 

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Hi Ashley, 

I suffer just like you used to, as regards to contamination and having to shower and change clothes, my therapist is ringing me in two weeks time then unfortunately my sessions have finished. How did you improve, what did you do??? I’m really struggling with this OCD and anxiety and fear and so on. Did you have a private therapist??? Thankyou. Xx

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How many sessions and did it help you? Also, if you want to, could you explain what you mean with "private therapist"? Did you go to group therapy or solo?

Edited by OCDhavenobrain

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2 hours ago, Madchoc said:

Hi Ashley, 

I suffer just like you used to, as regards to contamination and having to shower and change clothes, my therapist is ringing me in two weeks time then unfortunately my sessions have finished. How did you improve, what did you do??? I’m really struggling with this OCD and anxiety and fear and so on. Did you have a private therapist??? Thankyou. Xx

 

2 hours ago, Madchoc said:

Hi Ashley, 

I suffer just like you used to, as regards to contamination and having to shower and change clothes, my therapist is ringing me in two weeks time then unfortunately my sessions have finished. How did you improve, what did you do??? I’m really struggling with this OCD and anxiety and fear and so on. Did you have a private therapist??? Thankyou. Xx

 

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On 16/03/2019 at 12:12, Ashley said:

I can relate to this, and if I am honest if I think back a few years this was me too Lonely Mum, in fact if I think back two decades I would have to shower if I just nipped across the road to the local shop.  At one point I would have to have indoor and outdoor clothes and the two couldn't mix.

But, I am in a different place now, and maybe one day you can be too Lonely mum. I now go out and come back in and sit on my sofa with clothes I have worn outside, I go out and don't shower when I return. My life is different to how it used to be, and to some extent I had even forgot how my life used to be, it's posts like yours that remind me.    I am not saying that to say 'look at me', I am saying this in the hope that you might get some belief that your life can change for the better too.

The others have made good points, but I did want to ask, have you been able to access any kind of help or support for your OCD yet? I know from my support group that OCD treatment in Leicester is not always the best it should be. So there may be other options if you have already had treatment.

Stay strong, you've got this!

 

I had group therapy which didn’t help.  And a focuple of one to one with a therapist but this was 4yrs ago and it didn’t help me.  I can’t afford  private therapy.  The group didn’t really focus on my issues - I was really left to it.  I then had children who have extra issues so my issues are at the bottom of the pit.  I’ve tried again to speak with doctor who said I’d need to talk about the domestic violence I’d encountered in the past.  And I’m waiting! 

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