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About carolj

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    OCD-UK Member and

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    Family or Friend

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    South East

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  1. carolj

    Waiting list for Psychiatrist

    Hi I notice you are in Nottingham, have you thought about going to the Nottingham support group, which is actually run by Ashley and I am sure would be very beneficial? I'm not sure how old your daughter is and whether it is appropriate for her, you could check with Ashley, but you would be very welcome, as i have been when we had a local support group. https://www.ocduk.org/support-groups/nottingham/ There is one this coming week!
  2. carolj

    Kaz s

    Hi Kaz, I notice back in June your son saw a dr (although not much use!) and he had an appointment at the wellbeing clinic. Did anything come of that? You are in a difficult situation because your son is now classed as an adult, but so was my son. I have found that if I say to the doctor 'I know you can't talk to me, but I need to talk to you about my son', that usually works. How does your son feel about treatment now? My son insisted he could manage this himself. I always told him I would help him when he wanted it and suddenly one day, he said 'I can't do this by myself any more'. I thought that was an important turning point, because it was something he decided and I hadn't made that decision for him.
  3. carolj

    Specialist schools

    Its interesting that so many parents don't want their children to go into specialist schools and yet when they visit their opinion changes. My daughter says its simple things like, plain white walls, which to us look boring, but to the children, its calm. I so hope you find the right help for your son, just knowing he is being looked after at school can at least give you some peace of mind. The summer scheme sounds very good, I suppose the only way you can look at it is that he did manage 2 days? So hard to follow when rituals change isn't it, one disappears and another pops up!!! My daughter's university decided to base the master's degree on this occasion around mental health in children. Of course she jumped at the chance to do this, as she knows how important it is to have the expertise to help the children who need it. Do let us know how you get on. xx
  4. carolj

    Specialist schools

    Im not sure where you are, but my daughter says the EHCP gives you the power to request what you consider best for your child, in your case, a 'specialist setting'. The only problem is if the school says they can meet his needs. I hope this helps a bit, although the system doesn't seem to be quite the same.
  5. carolj

    Specialist schools

    My daughter is a SENCO and I have mentioned your son to her. I couldn't remember how old he is, but she asked, does he have an EHCP?
  6. carolj

    Nip In The Bud

    Just watched an information film on OCD in children on TV, which I thought was extremely well done and very informative to both parents and teachers https://nipinthebud.org
  7. carolj

    I feel so powerless

    Hi Cathy and welcome to the forum. Im sure there will be people on here who understand exactly what you are going through. I have seen many over the years. It is my adult son who has OCD, so my experiences are slightly different, but I do know that somehow your husband has to understand that you can't be controlled like this, nor should you be. It doesn't help that his mother won't get involved. The problem is that OCD takes more and more and no matter how much you comply with his demands, it will never be enough. I wish I could be more helpful, but in a calm moment, can you get him to understand that your future lies with him getting help? Carol x
  8. I suppose the important thing is, are they treating your daughter in the meantime? It really is difficult to say whether getting a private report and taking it to CAMHS would have any affect on how they are treating your daughter. My son has been mainly in the private system, but NHS do step in in a crisis, with varying success. The first time when he was feeling suicidal, they gave him a leaflet on a computer course (yes really!), but the second time more recently, they had a team meet with him every day. They obviously took him more seriously that time! So I don't think they would automatically withdraw their services, but whether they take any notice of a report is another matter. The problem is that they are all different and who knows how they will react!
  9. carolj

    Use of CBD for OCD?

    I was just looking back at your posts from last year and I wondered if your son has now officially been diagnosed with OCD and whether he made it to uni and how he is doing?
  10. carolj

    Jonny Wilkinson

    Jonny Wilkinson was on This Morning on Tuesday and I can really recommend watching him talk in depth about his anxiety. He was very honest and although it may not strictly be OCD, I recognised a lot of my son in him.
  11. carolj


    Hi Tasha, welcome to the forum. I'm so sorry to hear your daughter is struggling after doing so well and it is devastating to hear your child saying she wants to kill herself. My son often said this and now he acknowledges he really just didn't want to be here. Actually blamed me for having him more often than not! Is she now with cahms? Have they given an explanation as to why its only every 2/3 weeks rather than once a week, especially with her OCD being so bad and not having been to school for so long. Do the school understand her problems and try to help? Does her OCD allow her to leave the house to see friends or go out with you? Sorry for all the questions, but it might help us make a few suggestions. Carol x
  12. carolj

    Relationship OCD

    As you say PolarBear, OCD is OCD and Jos' son getting help is the really important of part of this and him beginning to understand why he feels like this.
  13. carolj

    Relationship OCD

    Out of all you have said Headwreck, this I think sums it up. As I have heard said before, a sufferer needs certainty and there is no certainty in life. My son suffers with this and as Headwreck also says OCD can change focus, as it has with my son many times. My son sees a psychiatrist who has many years experience of OCD and she always tells him that if he stops his rituals, which are mainly performed in his head, she won't promise him whatever he is worried about won't happen, that's what life is like, uncertain. If something does happen, he can also be convinced he made it happen with his thoughts and then you can get 'I told you so', when actually its just life. Its incredibly hard for us non-sufferers to understand how all consuming this can be. We would be sad if a relationship broke up, but it does happen to most of us at some time. I feel for all of you and especially your son's girlfriend. When he has treatment, she is going to have to start resisting his demands for reassurance and that will probably be even harder, but reassurance doesn't work, it just makes OCD demand more, as the lie detector tests showed. I hope your son gets the help he needs very soon and they can start working on it together. We are all here if we can be of help. Carol
  14. carolj

    Craig in Corrie

    I haven't watched it, but my Mum said the actor playing Craig was on This Morning with an OCD sufferer called Richard (?) and that he did a really good job explaining OCD.
  15. Hi, I was just wondering, do you suffer from OCD, or are you family or friend? Not that you can't post in here if you are suffering from OCD, but you may get a better response in the main forum. I would just say, over the years my son's OCD has taught me that anything can become an obsession.