Guest Phil10 Posted November 23, 2018 Share Posted November 23, 2018 Like at the moment I have head tension and feel anxiety most of the time I believe it’s due to the ocd thoughts because I have them all the time right now? Link to comment
felix4 Posted November 24, 2018 Share Posted November 24, 2018 On 22/11/2018 at 21:04, OCDhavenobrain said: Not sure if you are ironic or not here, hehe. Even if I do agree with you that a therapist is best to have, because this is so hard anyway.. But I have to say that Phil have to change his mindset, I am afraid you can have all the therapy in the world and still be compulsive. Phil have to really let the idea that all of this is unnecassarily and that the thoughts aren't the problem. To me it seems like Phil is running around solving individual compulsions. In this case I would advice some book or something, because I feel like the information isn't there? Could be wrong here, but do you actually understand how OCD works Phil? Or do you think that all those individual problems which emerges is the real problem? Why do you get anxious do you have an idea to why you are getting anxious? Hi, I guess it is all dependent on how well/unwell we are, and how as individuals we best take information in, and so on. Self help books are good, but personally I struggle taking read information on board, especially when lengthy & complex and during worse times of depression. For me, I engaged best with specialist group CBT. I had CBT a number of times prior to this, which were poor quality in comparison, but yeah, it was about session 8 where everything clicked into place, and it really took the sting out of ERP! On 22/11/2018 at 20:51, Phil10 said: Well basically I said to her I will wait and see if I can get any nhs therapy if not maybe come back she said ok could maybe have more sessions while I wait for Cbt. Now I found out I can’t have any Cbt on the nhs and now I emailed the theripst she told try YouTube and apps! My psychiatrist told me YouTube too. So there you go I am struggling and nobody seems to give a hoot. At the moment I’m not having therapy as obviously she doesn’t want to see me again despite me paying £40 a session. So basically I will struggle on myself and if need be at a later date I would now have to look for another theripst willing to help me.. Hi Phil, That is shocking with regards to YouTube! Have you tried contacting the OCD charities for help finding a better qualified therapist in your area? Link to comment
Guest Phil10 Posted November 24, 2018 Share Posted November 24, 2018 I’m in a bit of a loop with the ocd again it’s another one of those like the camera where replacing it still doesn’t help So I bought a new iron board and iron and worried about the colour not being safe like superstition ocd. I returned the iron board and my partners iron she got a new one as she uses a different one tonight I got changed and I washed my hands then doubted that I washed my hands so my ocd said more dirty washing germs would come on the new iron board so I went back to a loop where I will let her maybe use old iron board as even using the new one wouldn’t solve all my ocd. In the past I replace stuff and it teneds to help but given how bad my ocd is I’m at a doubting everything stage another example of this is when my ocd is bad I could take my medication and worry I never took it? Can anyone relate to this where doing a compulsion doesn’t even help? I know it’s bad I’ve done these compulsions anyway but like it feels like there’s no escape and I could guy lots of irons and never escape the anxiety. Like this happens a lot I was taking towel after towel in a shower one day I took about 5 and after that I realised no towel would feel right that day? Luckily im back to using only one towel Link to comment
Guest Phil10 Posted November 24, 2018 Share Posted November 24, 2018 http://beyondocd.org/information-for-college-students/compulsion-dont-help This link says doing compulsions makes them come back stronger is this what is happening? Link to comment
Guest Phil10 Posted November 24, 2018 Share Posted November 24, 2018 So possibly the only way for me to escape it is another compulsion by returning the iron or not using Link to comment
PolarBear Posted November 25, 2018 Share Posted November 25, 2018 1 hour ago, Phil10 said: http://beyondocd.org/information-for-college-students/compulsion-dont-help This link says doing compulsions makes them come back stronger is this what is happening? Of course compulsions don't work. They are the fuel that powers the OCD engine. Doing compulsions causes more anxiety, more doubt and more intrusive thoughts in the future. We've been trying to tell you this for some time now. Link to comment
PolarBear Posted November 25, 2018 Share Posted November 25, 2018 1 hour ago, Phil10 said: So possibly the only way for me to escape it is another compulsion by returning the iron or not using Or... you could do nothing, use the iron like anyone else would, tell your OCD to go you-know-where and put up with the anxiety, which will go away on its own, so long as you don't ruminate over the iron. Link to comment
Guest Phil10 Posted November 25, 2018 Share Posted November 25, 2018 1 hour ago, PolarBear said: Or... you could do nothing, use the iron like anyone else would, tell your OCD to go you-know-where and put up with the anxiety, which will go away on its own, so long as you don't ruminate over the iron. Well you are correct with the front door the anxiety did drop off as it was very bad at first for many weeks until my mind got bored. But sometimes I struggle with the anxiety and if the item cheap I feel it’s easier to dispose of. When I have these thoughts on an endless loop it’s hard. I’m guessing some form of distraction will help? Do I study ocd books when I feel this way or do I find a new hobby to take my mind away from it? I think sitting with the anxiety is the hardest part and whilst I have shown I can do it the way I believe something is “forever contaminated” is hard as my mind buys into this. I read ocd is a learned behaviour so it’s like a bad habit which I got into. Perhaps I need to focus on anxiety management techniques as a way to treat the ocd? Link to comment
Guest OCDhavenobrain Posted November 25, 2018 Share Posted November 25, 2018 On 24/11/2018 at 01:39, felix4 said: Hi, I guess it is all dependent on how well/unwell we are, and how as individuals we best take information in, and so on. Self help books are good, but personally I struggle taking read information on board, especially when lengthy & complex and during worse times of depression. For me, I engaged best with specialist group CBT. I had CBT a number of times prior to this, which were poor quality in comparison, but yeah, it was about session 8 where everything clicked into place, and it really took the sting out of ERP! Hi Phil, That is shocking with regards to YouTube! Have you tried contacting the OCD charities for help finding a better qualified therapist in your area? I also think that group-therapy can be good. It really do hit you that you are not uniquely suffering Link to comment
Guest Phil10 Posted November 25, 2018 Share Posted November 25, 2018 4 hours ago, OCDhavenobrain said: I also think that group-therapy can be good. It really do hit you that you are not uniquely suffering I found a stress management course on nhs site in my area it’s for learning cbt and relaxation and controlling panic it doesn’t start until next year but it’s free and runs over six weeks they say it’s not group therapy and all seats face the front. Is this worth a go? Link to comment
Guest Phil10 Posted November 25, 2018 Share Posted November 25, 2018 (edited) I seem on an endless loop with the dirty washing today I was out shopping she had the thought all my clothes were dirty. I changed my zipper on the same room as my new crates I got now I worry that’s contaminated and I got another iron I won’t use that so at the moment I’m actually buying more stuff too worried to use it and im using the old iron and iron board but the more I replace something else keeps coming then something else I returned the iron board due to its colour :/ The result is I’m feeling constantly anxious Edited November 25, 2018 by Phil10 Link to comment
PolarBear Posted November 25, 2018 Share Posted November 25, 2018 So what you're saying is sll those compulsions don't work. You get more thoughts of contamination and more anxiety. We've been trying to tell you that. If compulsions don't really make things better, why keep doing them? Link to comment
Guest Phil10 Posted November 25, 2018 Share Posted November 25, 2018 40 minutes ago, PolarBear said: So what you're saying is sll those compulsions don't work. You get more thoughts of contamination and more anxiety. We've been trying to tell you that. If compulsions don't really make things better, why keep doing them? Well you see the compulsions usually do work but my ocd has rocketed so much when it’s at its worst I get even more ocd. Under milder ocd the compulsion would work, when I did the compulsion I believed it would work. I am possibly getting more beta blocker tablets which may help because it seems to bring my anxiety down therefore my ocd isn’t as bad. What I can say is when I posted this thread a few months ago I was only getting the odd bit of ocd but over the months it went to every second of the day. I am hopeful it will become more mild again. I mean it would be great to get over it forever but that’s a tough task? I think my only hope is it becomes more mild again Link to comment
dksea Posted November 26, 2018 Share Posted November 26, 2018 19 minutes ago, Phil10 said: Well you see the compulsions usually do work but my ocd has rocketed so much when it’s at its worst I get even more ocd. Under milder ocd the compulsion would work, when I did the compulsion I believed it would work. The compulsions provide temporary relief at the cost of increasing the OCD long term. It's like paying the minimum balance on a credit card. Yes the bill goes away for that month, but the amount you owe is getting bigger and bigger and eventually you'll have to pay it all. Or to use a less pleasant metaphor, every compulsion is like taking a hit of heroin. It might make you feel good in the moment but you're just strengthening the addiction and making your life worse overall. 21 minutes ago, Phil10 said: What I can say is when I posted this thread a few months ago I was only getting the odd bit of ocd but over the months it went to every second of the day. I am hopeful it will become more mild again. I mean it would be great to get over it forever but that’s a tough task? I think my only hope is it becomes more mild again Its not going to become more mild on its own, and its not going to become more mild if you keep doing compulsions. Doing the compulsions only strengthens the connection in your brain and causes the OCD to grow stronger and stronger. You are digger yourself deeper and deeper into a hole and telling yourself that maybe the next shovelful of dirt will be the one that makes the hole shorter instead of deeper. If you want to get better then you have to stop doing the compulsions. If you want to get better you have to start challenging the obsessive thoughts. If you want to get better you have to sit through the anxiety. None of these things are easy, thats true, but they are all possible and they will help you in the long run. On 24/11/2018 at 06:28, Phil10 said: Like at the moment I have head tension and feel anxiety most of the time I believe it’s due to the ocd thoughts because I have them all the time right now? Yes, right now because you have convinced your mind that this "contamination" issue is so important by engaging in compulsions so often the thoughts are going to be frequent. It will take time for them to be less frequent, just like it takes time to lose your craving for a cigarette when you are addicted to those. We understand you feel anxiety right now, thats OCD. We've told you what to do about it, its up to you whether you decide to do it or not. Link to comment
felix4 Posted November 26, 2018 Share Posted November 26, 2018 On 24/11/2018 at 22:41, Phil10 said: http://beyondocd.org/information-for-college-students/compulsion-dont-help This link says doing compulsions makes them come back stronger is this what is happening? The link says doing compulsions makes obsessions come back stronger. The compulsions may give you temporary relief, but in the long run, they actually reinforce the obsessive thoughts. 1 hour ago, Phil10 said: Well you see the compulsions usually do work but my ocd has rocketed so much when it’s at its worst I get even more ocd. ? No, presumably your OCD has rocketed because you have carried out compulsions which your OCD has duped you into thinking work! Link to comment
gingerbreadgirl Posted November 26, 2018 Share Posted November 26, 2018 (edited) 13 hours ago, Phil10 said: Well you see the compulsions usually do work No no no no no. This is the major thing you really really need to get your head round Phil. Compulsions never work. They bring temporary relief at best. But over the long haul they make ocd worse and that is the ONLY reason you are experiencing this anxiety now - because of compulsions you have done in the past. You need to decide enough is enough - and stop playing ocd's game. Edited November 26, 2018 by gingerbreadgirl Link to comment
Guest Phil10 Posted November 26, 2018 Share Posted November 26, 2018 Basically I got a new iron board took that back I went for a shower before the new one came I changed towels three times, changed clothes three times and the new iron came and I worried my clothes were dirty I bashed that thought off then I had a false thought I went into the bathroom with the iron and touched dirty laundry even though that wasnt true so basically I couldn’t track my mind back to how I carried it in. Anyway I now own 5 irons! That’s how bad my ocd is obviously I have to sell some or something as I don’t need all these but it shows how much effort I have put into avoiding feeling unforgettable and these dirty washing thoughts. Basically my mind wants to believe every iron is dirty or not a safe colour I don’t know why my mind has went in this loop. Link to comment
gingerbreadgirl Posted November 26, 2018 Share Posted November 26, 2018 1 minute ago, Phil10 said: I don’t know why my mind has went in this loop. it is because you keep feeding the loop with compulsions. You need to cut it off. Link to comment
Guest Phil10 Posted November 26, 2018 Share Posted November 26, 2018 1 minute ago, gingerbreadgirl said: it is because you keep feeding the loop with compulsions. You need to cut it off. Yes I mean nothing I do is going to make me believe the iron is clean right now it’s that bad. Obviously I have to use an iron otherwise my clothes will be very crushed. I had this issue with the new camera I replaced it and instantly worried it was dirty. In the end I give up replacing as it does me no use at all the relief I get can only last minutes sometimes Link to comment
Guest Phil10 Posted November 26, 2018 Share Posted November 26, 2018 I sat for 30 mins finding a way to believe the new iron was dirty Link to comment
Caramoole Posted November 26, 2018 Share Posted November 26, 2018 Quote I sat for 30 mins finding a way to believe the new iron was dirty What could/should you have done differently? Link to comment
Guest Phil10 Posted November 26, 2018 Share Posted November 26, 2018 5 minutes ago, Caramoole said: What could/should you have done differently? Perhaps found something to take my mind off it? Not sure if I’m doing right things Link to comment
PolarBear Posted November 26, 2018 Share Posted November 26, 2018 Sitting there trying to work out irrational thoughts will not work. You can't make the irrational rational. Link to comment
Caramoole Posted November 26, 2018 Share Posted November 26, 2018 1 hour ago, Phil10 said: Perhaps found something to take my mind off it? Not sure if I’m doing right things The first thing is to become aware of what you're doing. Identify that you're sitting there ruminating and trying to solve this. As PB says, it won't work so you have to actively steer your mind away from the internal conversations that you're having. Yes, perhaps get active with something else but work at identifying the wrong behaviour and work at actively not engaging with this "problem solving" train of thought which you're doing to try and reassure yourself and neutralise the anxiety. Link to comment
Guest Phil10 Posted November 26, 2018 Share Posted November 26, 2018 Ok there is like a pure ocd term where you have false memory ocd is this something I am suffering? I looked it up and whilst some of the patterns are about religion or driving the thoughts are false in nature so is this similar to when I have these thoughts? Link to comment
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