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Gemma7

OCD-UK Member
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Everything posted by Gemma7

  1. I'm really not sure you are quite understanding what ERP entails, at least not in regards to this current problem. Watching the films is not an exposure exercise, since you don't want to. Your compulsion isn't avoiding watching the film, so that isn't the response you're trying to prevent. An example where someone would watch a film as part of ERP, is someone who was a fan of the genre, and really wanted to watch the films, but might get triggered during them. Then watching them would be part of a long process of psychoeducation, and structured behavioural experiments/ERP. In your case, you just want to be able to get by with seeing adverts and titles without being trapped by OCD. In this instance, your compulsions differ. They involve avoiding places you might see titles, like libraries or movie theatres. It might also involve blocking thoughts, trying to manipulate thoughts so they don't feel as scary. In these cases, ERP would focus on going to librairies, having a look around in all sections, allowing thoughts in etc. ERP is about not doing the compulsions you're currently doing, it is not about getting used to genres you will always dislike, which is akin to flooding, which has been shown to be either useless or potentially damaging. It is a very important, distinct difference and shouldn't be confused, as people may worry that therapy will be about forcing them to do stuff they don't want to do. CBT should always be about allowing you to live life as you choose, without being limited by OCD.
  2. I think being aware of these two in particular was helpful when I was getting started with CBT. Emotional reasoning, so if I feel a particular way, then that is evidence that something is wrong, (which it wasn't obv). Jumping to conclusions, so thinking for example that because two things happen together, one must be caused by the other. Or because something caught my eye, it must be the thing I fear. Or because I've had this particular thought, it means I'm a bad person. I think these are valuable thinking styles to highlight as they really do hold us back. They highlight what reasoning we use to do compulsions, but they aren't really about negative or positive thinking per se. They are just ways people think when they are anxious about something. If you learn to notice when you think these ways, it can diminish the power of OCD, and make it easier to challenge your fears.
  3. It really depends on what you're doing with the thoughts though. If you're developing a positive outlook like, how I feel now, won't be how I feel forever, I have food, water and shelter, which allows me to be comfortable while in distress, then fair enough. If on the other hand, it becomes an exercise in exploring for example, how you're a good person, thinking of evidence for that, arguing with the thought, disputing it's truth etc. Then it's a compulsion. The concern with following a CBT guidebook alone, is that it's very easy to miss the subtley of what was intended by the writer. This is where the guidance of a good therapist is invaluable. I don't recall these methods being used in Break Free from OCD or CBT for OCD (which is aimed at professionals), so I personally would avoid this ambiguous method.
  4. Hi SeaBreeze, I'm sorry to hear that the last two nights have been really awful for you. I know it seems really severe all of a sudden, but it's possible that this is just a blip rather than a full relapse. Is it a repeat of old problems resurfacing? Did you do therapy previously, have you got any old notes you can look over? Was there something stressful that might have triggered OCD, that might pass? In the short term, focus on trying to get some much needed rest. That way you will be much more able to challenge OCD, even if it is just a small win
  5. Suicide ideation can happen for some young people and it's really good that your doctor mentioned it. I think problems mostly arise when people aren't made aware of this possible side effect. I took sertraline aged 20 and was warned similarly, but I didn't experience it. Everyone is different and everyone experiences different effects. If you wanted to try fluoxetine, it's most important that you're aware and if you take it and have any concerns during, then it's best to talk to your doctor
  6. I binged watched it too. Really enjoyed it but found the story truly devastating
  7. Hopefully the electrician who installed the smoke alarm will respond soon and come up with a way to fix the problem. Have you tried contacting your landlord just to see if they get back to you? I have in fact lived with a beeping alarm when I struggled to change it due to OCD so have some experience. I actually gave my alarm a name Bertie Beep which made me respond to it in a much less stressful way. Whenever Bertie beeped it was him having his say about something or other. Adding that bit of fun made it much more tolerable. I hope this is helpful and you get it sorted soon :)
  8. I agree, I wasn't suggesting that you base your actions on being sure that there is no threat. Indeed, you have to take a leap of faith that what you fear won't happen. Sorry if there was some confusion there
  9. Hi OxCD, I'm not sure what part you're disagreeing with
  10. I'm not sure I agree with your therapist's take on CBT. When is it your supposed to use that phrase? In therapy you should learn about the prevalence of violent thoughts in the general population, learn that they are common and very ordinary. That someone with OCD places importance on having the thought itself, believing it to either say something about them (which it doesn't) or that they are more likely to act on a thought because it's present (you're not). They usually then look at what behaviours you do that keep making the thought bother you. These may be internal behaviours like arguing with the thought, blocking the thought or external behaviours like checking or avoiding people, places or objects. You then try out behavioural experiments where you don't do these behaviours and compare what you think will happen with what does happen. The reason people choose to say to OCD, yes I will do this/that, is usually part of also behaving as if the thought means nothing. You can't do one without the other. It's essential that you act as if the thought has no meaning. And you base that behaviour on the general education about thoughts. Is that any clearer, I know I've written a lot? Is your therapist an NHS therapist or a private therapist?
  11. Hi NPG I'm sorry to hear your daughter is struggling so much at the moment. It's great that she's on the waiting list for therapy and getting some support from her university There are a couple of things you could do. You could look into private therapy, if that's something you believe you could afford. It's important to consider the waiting time in your area, because you don't want to start private therapy and then shortly afterwards change therapist when one becomes available on the NHS. For information on private therapy you could look at the OCD-UK website here, https://www.ocduk.org/overcoming-ocd/accessing-ocd-treatment/accessing-ocd-treatment-privately/ I also highly recommend the self-help book Break free from OCD by Paul Salkovskis, Fiona Challacombe and Victoria Bream Oldfield. It's written by specialists in the treatment of OCD and takes you through what OCD is, how it's maintained and how to begin tackling it. I recommend that both you and your daughter read it, because it can really help to discuss and understand OCD together. There is also the forums that she could reach out to for support and OCD-UK are also running online support groups at the moment which your daughter could look into attending. https://www.ocduk.org/support-groups/zoom/
  12. Hi Mcajshaw I know it doesn't feel like it, but inadvertently speaking thoughts is no different from just thinking them. It's happened to me where I blurt out stuff that's going on in my head, including OCD thoughts. With OCD our brains can be so busy and full I think it can just happen. It's important to treat this like all thoughts. Adding meaning to them being spoken out loud is a natural thing for an OCD sufferer to do, but they can be ignored just the same
  13. Hi Janet The best place to start for getting help for OCD is your GP. They can refer you to your local IAPT, which is where you can access Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). This is the recommended therapy for OCD. A GP may also offer medications called Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors (SSRIs) but it's a personal choice whether your daughter wants to take them, not all sufferers do. In the mean time, I wouldn't recommend pulling help from your daughter. It could cause unnecessary conflict and distress for both of you and is unlikely to help her get better. I do think it's important to start talking about OCD though and particularly learning about it. I highly recommend the self-help book Break free from OCD. It talks about what OCD is, how it is maintained and how to start challenging it. Perhaps you could read it together, so you could both learn a dialogue that works for you when your daughter is highly anxious. It's also a great tool to have if you have to wait for therapy. Your daughter could also look into OCD-UK run support groups, they are being done remotely because of Covid-19 so all she needs is access to a computer. Information for those are here, https://www.ocduk.org/support-groups/zoom/ There is also a free to download special edition of the OCD-UK magazine Compulsive Reading, with tips on coping through the pandemic, https://www.ocduk.org/april-compulsive-reading/ OCD is a very treatable condition with the right help and support, so there is plenty of hope for the future
  14. I really hope you get somewhere with your GP
  15. That's ok, it of course might take time to get your head around tackling OCD, especially when it's been part of your life for so long. I would definitely look into Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. In the UK that's usually accessed via a referral from your GP or in England you can self-refer In the mean time I highly recommend the self-help book Break free from OCD. It's written by OCD specialists and is a great introduction to CBT and takes you through how to start tackling OCD. It's also a great way to learn what therapy is and what to expect during a session. I have only had one experience with one on one therapy and it wasn't very good. That can happen, some therapists are more skilled than others. I have mainly used self-help resources, and although they were great, I definitely think the support of a therapist would have got me to a better place, so that's what I'd recommend for anyone Support groups can be good, although they obviously don't replace therapy. But support groups and the forum are great places to hear other people's experiences and talk with people who understand what you're going through. OCD-UK are currently running online support groups, information is here, https://www.ocduk.org/support-groups/zoom/
  16. Hi Cora It's ok that you're negative. OCD is incredibly difficult to cope with and like Malina said, we've all been there ourselves Is the therapist you're seeing a private therapist? What reason have they given for you having to give up therapy to move to IAPT? How are you finding therapy? Have you noticed any improvement? Because it might be if you're struggling despite being in therapy, moving on could be a good thing. Have you looked into any OCD self-help books? There are some great ones like 'Break free from OCD' written by OCD specialists and a one called 'OCD, Anxiety, Panic Attacks and Related Depression: The Definitive Survival and Recovery Approach' by Adam Shaw and Lauren Callaghan. Adam used to have thoughts about hurting people including his children and overcame them with the help of his therapist Lauren You don't have to keep feeling like this Cora. There are lots of sufferers who thought they wouldn't ever feel positive again who absolutely have, all you need is the right support and tools to do it
  17. I know approximately how and when my OCD started but knowing that, although helpful to understand myself, doesn't actually help me tackle my OCD. I believe most OCD specialists will always want to tackle the here and now problems, for the exact reasons you've discovered. Whatever happened in the past, the vicious circle that OCD has you in is very much a problem that you are part of now. The feelings are real and the want to do compulsions isn't going to change just because you know how it all started. Are you getting any therapy currently?
  18. Great advice and support Malina I agree, there is so much to fight for Cora. I know that right now it feels overwhelming and that you'll always be affected by these doubts, but that isn't true at all. You are absolutely capable of overcoming OCD and living a wonderful life. Are you getting any therapy at the moment?
  19. Hi Littlefoot, it sounds like a really difficult time at the moment and I really hope you manage to get somewhere with everything. Has the mental health team that your son is currently with given you any indications of pathways to transfer him back to the Croydon team? Or have you spoken to his GP in Croydon where I'm assuming he's registered? It seems ridiculous that he can't be passed on to the Croydon team from Warwick. As for getting PIP and UC, your son should still be eligible even if he isn't under the mental health team. He clearly is not in a place that he can work. When I last applied for benefits, which might be about 10 years ago now, I was not under any team, I didn't even see my GP ever, but I still managed to get benefits, always after appeal though. Have you ever thought to contact Citizen's Advice? They were a great help to me with benefits and also might have some insights into what your rights are with regards your son's health care. It also sounds like your son might need further specialist therapy. Did he improve while at the Maudsley? Perhaps that's something else you could consider. Remember that you and your family are not alone in your struggles and it can be really tough on everybody involved. So try to take time to look after yourself too
  20. Hi there Danielle I'm sorry to hear about your son and the struggle you're having accessing help. Have you thought about seeing a GP with your son? GPs can refer to your local CAMHS services, which stands for Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service. Waiting times will vary depending on where you are in the country, but it could be good to start the process
  21. Hi angels, I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling so much at the moment Your OCD asks why you are nervous, so I'm assuming that you feel like you shouldn't feel nervous at times when you do? The thing is worrying about and analysing whether you're nervous could very much contribute to feelings of anxiety, which in turn will make you feel nervous, so it's a vicious circle. With OCD, you have to stop trying to work out the answer to the question, 'why are you nervous?' The truth is the answer is either, you aren't nervous but are feeling anxious because of OCD worry, making you feel like you're nervous, you're not nervous but are over-analysing your physical sensations, making things that you would have ignored (like mildly sweaty palms) as signs of nervousness or you're just nervous and that's completely OK. If I was about to do a presentation I'd be nervous, it's no big deal. Being a little nervous is natural even in the best of speakers. Also, it's important not to get into an internal argument about what thoughts are and aren't OCD. It can be easy to fall into this trap. All your thoughts are your thoughts and they can all be equally ignored.
  22. Hi Chirpy I don't have the exact same fears as you but I definitely find a change to my routine can sometimes throw my worries all over the place. Lockdown has been particularly challenging because there has been so little distraction. It's funny how having a routine, a job to go to, and other social things to attend can be part of healthy coping strategies that help us cope with both OCD stresses and day to day anxiety. It's very possible that once your routine starts again and life slowly returns to normal, a lot of what you're experiencing will reduce. But it's important to also apply as much as you can from what you've learnt in CBT. Remember that these thoughts are just thoughts and despite feeling like you need to do something about them, you can ignore them like everyone else
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