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diomedes

Do others understand that something is wrong with you?

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Greetings to everyone,

I suffer from OCD-Panic Attack-Anxiety and I take 2x75mg Clomipramine and 2x75mg Pregabalin daily,

Relatively recently a good friend of mine confided in me that my situation is detectable from other people, people around me can actually realise that something is wrong with me,

Has anyone ever told you something like that? Do you notice that you are noticeable? 

If yes how do you feel about this?

 

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Really good question.

When I was in the throes of OCD, I was consistently worried that people around me could tell that something was wrong. I expended a lot of energy trying to appear normal.

Turns out it didn't always work. Those closest to me could tell, at least at times, that there was something wrong. 

Perhaps most noticeable was my inability to focus and be in the moment. I often seemed distracted.

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Yes, much less now than at one time. I also sometimes spot probably OCD candidates, e.g someone washing their hands in an over the top way etc. 

Edited by paradoxer

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Oh yes, apart from some of my compulsions being a bit obvious, people closeish to, me can spot it.

and typical of OCD I spend ages worrying about what people think of me, and everyone else just gets on with their  lives, my “odd” behaviour floating out of their minds a quickly as they have something else to think of.

Edited by Closed for repairs
There, their, even their!

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Guest dimmerswitch

I too worry constantly what others think of me. At work, colleagues have begun to notice I’ve been down recently. I’ve lived with ocd for over 25 years, and I feel I’ve done well hiding it. I have only told two people (apart from health specialists) in that time.

 

 

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On 01/02/2020 at 08:15, PolarBear said:

Really good question.

When I was in the throes of OCD, I was consistently worried that people around me could tell that something was wrong. I expended a lot of energy trying to appear normal.

Turns out it didn't always work. Those closest to me could tell, at least at times, that there was something wrong. 

Perhaps most noticeable was my inability to focus and be in the moment. I often seemed distracted.

My experience is the same as PB’s. I’m definitely more distracted and I do get depressed and unmotivated.

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Guest OCDhavenobrain

Generally anxiety destroys a person both on the inside and outside. When I had panicattacks in my worst period I didn't looked good. I can see that now from pictures. Inability to focus when having OCD is not even a question it's a fact.

My therapist said that people often aren't noticing if you are different, and I know that this comment is given so the sufferer wion't feel as bad about it but I would rather like to say that people do notice BUT they are probably not judging you, most people don't even think about strangers.

So yes anxiety is showing and it is bad for the person but other people are not thinking and judging you to the extent you think they do. 

If you want to overcome the effects which OCD have on your mind and body the answer is to overcome the OCD. The stress OCD puts on your mind and body is often the only real thing with the disorder, but yes that part is very real.

Edited by OCDhavenobrain

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On 02/02/2020 at 00:29, diomedes said:

Relatively recently a good friend of mine confided in me that my situation is detectable from other people, people around me can actually realise that something is wrong with me,

Has anyone ever told you something like that? Do you notice that you are noticeable? 

If yes how do you feel about this?

I've never had anyone straight up tell me that they noticed something.  Part of it may be politeness.  Part of it may be that I didn't tend to have visible outward compulsions.  Part of it may have been my own efforts to hide my problems in front of others.  My parents knew from the beginning, so to them it was more obvious when I was struggling of course, and I'm sure my siblings knew that at least something was wrong.  On the other hand, everyone has their own lives and own problems, and what we think is "obvious" may not be so to others.  

In the early years I didn't talk about my OCD with anyone expect my doctor and my parents.  Even my closest friends didn't know.  As I got older and started dating I told my serious girlfriends, but beyond that it still remained a secret.  It wasn't til I was in my twenties I think that I started opening up in general.  I don't tell everyone I meet now, but I am less concerned if people know.

If people can tell I am really struggling I think I'd like their concern and support.  As long as they don't make a huge deal out of this I won't mind if they notice and say something.  But that came with time.  In the beginning it would have embarrassed me to have them know.  I guess it depends on where you are at in your OCD journey and your individual circumstances how you might feel and be effected by people knowing.

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No question with me- when I was 10 I used to obsessively wash my hands in the school sink and got given the nickname 'Suds' because of the soap suds! I made a joke of it and used to pretend that I was about to perform surgery and practise 'resuscitation' on the sink sponge. 

I have to wear disposable gloves to my CMHT appointments. 

I try really hard to come across 'normal' but then when my contamination OCD is bad, it's really really obvious! 

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I was grabbing a bag at the supermarket self service checkout and it dropped to the floor so I got a different one. The lady next in the queue with her partner picked it up to give it to me. I felt really bad but I said I wanted a new one. She asked why. I said i thought it was dirty. Her partner put the “dirty” bag on the hanger. I felt like a bit of a crackpot.

So they look at my shopping and it was so for a load of fragrance free wet wipes and I could see them realising I have some sort of problem. The lady turned around and was whispering to her partner. I apologised lol

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I think so. I used to be able to hide it more in high school so the only thing that got noticed once in a while was me not wanting people to touch my phone screen. I was worried about grease and germs. Ig they noticed I was more paranoid as well bc they messed with me occasionally. At my work they probably just think I have anxiety or am unhappy or something. Idk though sometimes I’m decently normal so maybe they just think I’m just shy or miserable. Ig some of those things are true on top of the ocd. Also I get asked by people if I’m ok and get told to smile probably more than what’s normal.

Edited by Terriblethoughts

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